Thread: Aging Peyton Manning Now Forced To Take Field With Assistance Dog

DENVER—Noting that he is no longer capable of safely maneuvering across the field on his own, the Denver Broncos announced Tuesday that quarterback Peyton Manning will now be accompanied in all games by a specially trained assistance dog. “Given Peyton’s age and physical limitations, he needs Scout to help him navigate the pocket and find his way to and from the huddle,” said head coach Gary Kubiak, adding that the 2-year-old Labrador retriever—who the veteran quarterback will have on a leash at all times when stepping into the backfield—can recognize all of Manning’s voice commands and hand signals at the line of scrimmage and will then carefully guide him through a play accordingly.

http://www.theonion.com/article/agin...-assista-51858

It's on the internet it must be true.

He was tossing a frisbee to the dog, but it kept getting intercepted.

Continuing to bash the 2nd best QB in organizational history, not even to mention a first ballad HoF and one who will go down as one of the greatest QB's ever, and is responsible for the 2nd best 3-4 year run ever in Bronco history. The is why the Denver fanbase is right up there as one of the clown fanbases in the NFL and all of sports.

What a piece of crap

Originally Posted by silkamilkamonico

Continuing to bash the 2nd best QB in organizational history, not even to mention a first ballad HoF and one who will go down as one of the greatest QB's ever, and is responsible for the 2nd best 3-4 year run ever in Bronco history. The is why the Denver fanbase is right up there as one of the clown fanbases in the NFL and all of sports.

Originally Posted by Denver Native (Carol)

What a piece of crap

Um, it's an onion article. It's satire. Try to remove the sticks from your anuses.

Originally Posted by BroncoWave

Um, it's an onion article. It's satire. Try to remove the sticks from your anuses.

It's none of your business what my thoughts are on it.

Originally Posted by Denver Native (Carol)

It's none of your business what my thoughts are on it.

What, what? You posted your thoughts on the matter on a public forum. Don't post opinions if you don't want them replied to.

Originally Posted by BroncoWave

Um, it's an onion article. It's satire. Try to remove the sticks from your anuses.

I don't think he was talking about the article and I tend to agree with his butthurt on this topic.

The sense of self-reverence is strong with this forum. People are literally incapable of even having a laugh about something satirical. It's a football team....and it's a satire news site.

I get its satire, but it's pretty shitty and completely classless. If anyone talks like that about Elway, people are ready to murder mother******s...but no biggie with Manning. Appreciate what he's given us...an unexpected 4 year run of pretty good damn football. He needed to be sat..he dont need to be disrespected. If he hadn't come here, we'd probably all be miserable Broncos fans in the middle of tryingbto find a qb.

It was lame humor. Somebody put a lot into that and it still came out corny.

Originally Posted by Yashahla17

It was lame humor. Somebody put a lot into that and it still came out corny.

Came out stupid and not funny at all.

Originally Posted by foco

The sense of self-reverence is strong with this forum. People are literally incapable of even having a laugh about something satirical. It's a football team....and it's a satire news site.

I laughed, it's funny, he's old. I get it. You're not a genius that is a higher intellectual than the rest of us, but when you see the hate, foaming at the mouth bullshit about Manning that goes on around here, it's like people forgot what they have had. One of the greatest to ever play the game made us relevant for a few years, and nobody cares. I remember Tebow, Orton, Cutler, Plummer. We haven't been this relevant in a long time. Mannings old, he's sore, he's injured, and he's had a rough few games. Everybody's willing to throw that away for the unkown. Give manning a few games off, let him rest, and watch him come back like he did two weeks ago in Green Bay. He proved he's still capable.

Originally Posted by GEM

I get its satire, but it's pretty shitty and completely classless. If anyone talks like that about Elway, people are ready to murder mother******s...but no biggie with Manning. Appreciate what he's given us...an unexpected 4 year run of pretty good damn football. He needed to be sat..he dont need to be disrespected. If he hadn't come here, we'd probably all be miserable Broncos fans in the middle of tryingbto find a qb.

It's one thing to say it was lame humor or not funny. But classless? Again, this is an onion article. They basically all read like this. I still greatly appreciate what Manning has done for us, but that doesn't mean we can't have a laugh at his expense.

Completely different with he and Elway. Elway was a lifelong Bronco and brought us two rings. He gets held in much higher reverence than a guy who has been here for 3 and a half years on the tail end of his career. He just does. FTR though, if I read a funny satire piece making fun of Elway, I wouldn't find that classless either.

Originally Posted by Pudge

I laughed, it's funny, he's old. I get it. You're not a genius that is a higher intellectual than the rest of us, but when you see the hate, foaming at the mouth bullshit about Manning that goes on around here, it's like people forgot what they have had. One of the greatest to ever play the game made us relevant for a few years, and nobody cares. I remember Tebow, Orton, Cutler, Plummer. We haven't been this relevant in a long time. Mannings old, he's sore, he's injured, and he's had a rough few games. Everybody's willing to throw that away for the unkown. Give manning a few games off, let him rest, and watch him come back like he did two weeks ago in Green Bay. He proved he's still capable.

I think you are overreacting a bit to the post from one or two posters and extrapolating them onto everyone. The vast majority of people on here aren't expressing this "foaming at the mouth hate" to which you are referring.