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At the beginning of the preseason, I had the Broncos this year at 11-5 . . .
well, maybe 10-6, I hedged. And still, I was playing the part of homer, and
I knew it. I must have been kidding myself. The offensive line was offensive
. . . in a putrid sort of way. With one gimpy center and another so old I
should call him "sir," a raw rookie at left tackle, a right guard they had
dubbed "Too Fat To Play" (or TFTP), no one yet at right tackle, and a left
guard who had been knocked looney last year, Jay Cutler had about as
much chance of finishing the season in one piece as I had of winning the
100 meters at the summer olympics.
Moreover, the one star the Broncos had at wide receiver had just cut his
arm into bacon strips after slipping on a McDonald's bag and trying to add
this arm to the circuitry in his TV . . . or so he said. That's what he gets
for buying the garbage at McDonald's, but that's another story. Oh, and
meanwhile, he had successfully recruited his girlfriend as a sparring
partner, but the local officials were not amused.
But that was the only problem with the Broncos . . . not. Just another
minor problem or two, at tight end, running back, field goal kicker, punter,
defensive tackle, defensive end, and safety. No biggie. Just a couple items.
My wife apparently saw some red flags there because I couldn't find my
.357 magnum in the bottom drawer of our chest-of-drawers, so I was still
around to put on a pair of glasses with a gorgeous shade of orange. Yup,
I'd say 11-5, if not 10-6 . . . or 6-10. (I took off the glasses momentarily
to wipe a smudge.)
Fast forward to today.
The Broncos have just finished a preseason. I found my .357 and was going
to use it again, but this time to shoot into the air in celebration. But my
wife wouldn't let me. Guess she was afraid one of the bullets would come
back down and hit her miserable cat outside.
Anyway, the Broncos' first team had played Houston largely to a standstill,
then whipped the first teams of Dallas and Green Bay. Then they went to
Phoenix with their second- and third-stringers to face the Cardinals' first
stringers. And they whipped them.
Yeah, so it's only preseason. But four games? We gotta draw some
conclusions from four games, don't we? I mean, no sacks, 117 QB rating for
Cutler, good running game, the emergence of Fast Eddie Royal, Robertson
and Thomas looking like studs, linebackers shaping up and showing depth,
and Marshall kicking butt wherever he aims it . . . oh, and somehow he has
gotten bailed out of most of his problems. Yes, and every time Prater kicks
the ball, they have to repace it because they don't have time to go into
the next county to retrieve it.
So I have taken off my orange colored glasses . . . I think. So what do I
think? 11-5. Really.
Consider:
The Broncos go into Oakland, blitz their rookie quarterback senseless, and
Young gets 150 yards. Sweet revenge: The Raiders thought they had
caught a break with Marshall's absence. Maybe they did: They might have
lost by 35 points, rather than 20.
San Diego comes to town to hand the Broncos another 30-3 loss. That is
their biggest problem, besides a gimpy Merriman and a quarterback who
talks trash better than he plays football. The Broncos, with Cutler and
Marshall doing their Montana/Rice routine, surprise the Chargers 21-17.
The Saints are good, but let's face it: They're not as good as the
Cowboys, and you know what Clady and company did to them. Besides, it's
at Invesco. The Broncos head into that game at 2-0 and emerge 3-0, and
add another win a week later in Kansas City.
Nothing builds confidence like, well, building confidence. And the Broncos
have tons of it going into the games against Tampa Bay and Jacksonville.
Lose? Hey, they're on our turf. Uh-uh.
If I live to a hundred, I do not know how you let down for New England,
but that's what our heroes do. The Broncos come out flat, and the pansies
hang ten more points on us than we can on them.
Poor Miami. They should have called in sick, rather than come clear out to
Colorado country to face a bunch of angry Broncos. They go home with
the only good thing coming out of that game for them being that it came
to an end.
For some reason, that didn't take all the rage out of the Broncos because
the Browns are next to be at the wrong end of an obvious case of assault
and battery, football style. Several times, I see people staring at Cutler's
back. I think they are trying to decide whether Elway came out of
retirement.
Anyway, the Broncos then dispose of Atlanta and Oakland (yawn).
The New York Jets game would have been another down week, and
probably a loss, except that Favre is their leader now. No, he was an
upgrade for them . . . are you kidding? That's Brett Favre. Except that a
few Broncos are still around to remember last year. The Jets are just
another team, but Favre . . . well, that's special. Three sacks and two
interceptions (by Favre) later, Cutler has vividly demonstrated that there
has been a changing of the guard.
The Broncos get ambushed at Carolina, but somehow pull out a victory . . .
well, I say somehow. Champ's interception for a touchdown had a lot to do
with it. Oh, and another impression of Elway by Cutler in a fourth quarter
comeback was probably a factor, too.
Buffalo? They should have played Denver toward the first of the season,
not the end. Denver still might have beaten them, but it would not have
been a massacre. Well, I have to remember, this is football, not a venue
where you feel sorry for people.
Oops. San Diego is not surprised this time. By the time the dust settles and
the blood level sinks down to where we can see what happened, San Diego
has hung a 24 the Broncos, to the Broncos' 21. After a pristine season,
Prater picks a hell of a time to miss a last second field goal, but that's life
in the fast lane, as they say. But Phyllis isn't out there trash-talking on
Cutler this time. Must be that Cutler has doubled Rivers' yardage and
thoroughly outplayed him. Problem is, Mr. Tomlinson must have taken the
first loss seriously, because he just made the Broncos look like the 2007
version. But we have to remember, it's LT. 'Nuff said.
So that's how I get to my 11-5 this year . . . oh wait. Did I just count two
losses? Two (2) losses?
I need to go home and figure this all out. Oh wait . . . I am home. How
come everything looks so orange everywhere I look?
I'm so confused . . .
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