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DallasChief
01-15-2008, 11:20 AM
Hedley Lamarr (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0466327/): Qualifications?
Applicant: Rape, murder, arson, and rape.
Hedley Lamarr (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0466327/): You said rape twice.
Applicant: I like rape.

Broncolingus
01-15-2008, 11:31 AM
Parking Lot Guard: "Don't try to chruch it up, son."

(Joe Dirt)

Orangeblood
01-15-2008, 11:37 AM
"All I have in this world is my balls, and my word, and I don't break 'em for no one, 'jou understand?"

Tony Montana in "Scarface"

Kapaibro
01-15-2008, 11:37 AM
"Stop your grinnin' and drop your linen!" Pvt. Hudson - Aliens (that's the 2nd one)



"I aim to misbehave." Captain Mal Reynolds - Serenity

"Shiny! Let's be bad guys!" Jayne - Serenity

MOtorboat
01-15-2008, 12:00 PM
Rene: What are you doing? You promised me breakfast.
Brodie: Breakfast, shmreakfast. Look at the score, for Christ's sake. It's only the second period and I'm up 12 to 2. Breakfasts come and go, Rene, but Hartford, "the Whale," they only beat Vancouver once, maybe twice in a lifetime.

Orangeblood
01-15-2008, 12:05 PM
You think I'm funny? Funny how? Funny like a clown? I amuse you? I make you laugh? I'm here to f***ing amuse you? (Goodfellas)

Dyin Aint Much Of A Livin, Boy! (Outlaw Josey Wales)

cpr940
01-15-2008, 12:09 PM
Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

DallasChief
01-15-2008, 12:12 PM
Little Bill Daggett: Well, sir, you are a cowardly son of a *****! You just shot an unarmed man!
Will Munny: Well, he should have armed himself if he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend.

schnooks1
01-15-2008, 12:35 PM
Hans Gruber: Eh, that's... very kind of you, considering you are a mysterious party crasher. You are most troublesome, for a security guard.

John McClane: Bzzzt. Sorry Hans, wrong guess. Would you like to go for Double Jeopardy where the scores can really change?

Hans Gruber: Who are you then?

John McClane: Just a fly in the ointment, Hans. The monkey in the wrench. The pain in the ass


DIE HARD!

schnooks1
01-15-2008, 12:41 PM
Ghost of Christmas Present: Close your eyes...! And think of snowflakes and moonbeams and whiskers on kittens...

[She notices Frank peeking and goes to jab his eys with two fingers]
Ghost of Christmas Present: Nooooo peeking!
[Frank blocks the jab and closes his eyes]

Ghost of Christmas Present: Of rainbows, forget-me-nots... of misty meadows and sun-dappled pools. Oh, look! There's Mr Hedgehog. I wonder where he's going? Perhaps to HARLEM!
[She punches Frank]

Frank Cross: My jaw!
Ghost of Christmas Present: Sometimes the truth is painful, Frank


SCROOGED

Skinny
01-15-2008, 12:49 PM
Tombstone ... Doc Holliday ...
I'm your Huckleberry ...

Why Johnny Ringo, you look like somebody just walked all over your grave.

Broncolingus
01-15-2008, 01:31 PM
Receptionist: May I help you Dr...?
Fletch: Oh, it's me, Dr. Rosenpenis. I'm just here to check out Alan Stanwyk's file.
Receptionist: Dr. who?
Fletch: Dr. Rosenrosen, I'm here to get to the records room.
Receptionist: What was that name again?
Fletch: It's Dr. Rosen, I want to check the records room.
Receptionist: Dr. who?
Fletch: Dr. Rosen. Where the hell is the records room?

Skinny
01-15-2008, 02:03 PM
Patton ...
Clergyman ~ I was interested to see a Bible by your bed. You actually find time to read it?

Patton ~ I sure do. Every god**** day.

MOtorboat
01-15-2008, 02:06 PM
Nun: You don't believe in God because of Alice in Wonderland?
Loki: No, "Through the Looking Glass". That poem, "The Walrus and the Carpenter" that's an indictment of organized religion. The walrus, with his girth and his good nature, he obviously represents either Buddha, or... or with his tusk, the Hindu elephant god, Lord Ganesha. That takes care of your Eastern religions. Now the carpenter, which is an obvious reference to Jesus Christ, who was raised a carpenter's son, he represents the Western religions. Now in the poem, what do they do... what do they do? They... They dupe all these oysters into following them and then proceed to shuck and devour the helpless creatures en masse. I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following these faiths based on mythological figures ensure the destruction of one's inner-being. Organized religion destroys who we are by inhibiting our actions... by inhibiting our decisions, out of... out of fear of some... some intangible parent figure who... who shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says... and says, "Do it - Do it and I'll ******' spank you. "

And then a few seconds later:
Bartleby: You know, here's what I don't get about you. You know for a fact that there is a God. You have been in his presence. He's spoken to you personally, and yet I just heard you claim to be an atheist.
Loki: I just like to **** with the clergy, man. I just love it. I just love to keep those guys on their toes.

slim
01-15-2008, 02:08 PM
Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Whose gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Broncolingus
01-15-2008, 02:10 PM
Nun: You don't believe in God because of Alice in Wonderland?
Loki: No, "Through the Looking Glass". That poem, "The Walrus and the Carpenter" that's an indictment of organized religion. The walrus, with his girth and his good nature, he obviously represents either Buddha, or... or with his tusk, the Hindu elephant god, Lord Ganesha. That takes care of your Eastern religions. Now the carpenter, which is an obvious reference to Jesus Christ, who was raised a carpenter's son, he represents the Western religions. Now in the poem, what do they do... what do they do? They... They dupe all these oysters into following them and then proceed to shuck and devour the helpless creatures en masse. I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following these faiths based on mythological figures ensure the destruction of one's inner-being. Organized religion destroys who we are by inhibiting our actions... by inhibiting our decisions, out of... out of fear of some... some intangible parent figure who... who shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says... and says, "Do it - Do it and I'll ******' spank you. "

And then a few seconds later:
Bartleby: You know, here's what I don't get about you. You know for a fact that there is a God. You have been in his presence. He's spoken to you personally, and yet I just heard you claim to be an atheist.
Loki: I just like to **** with the clergy, man. I just love it. I just love to keep those guys on their toes.

I'm thinking Dogma?

"I'm telling you Lane, practically everybody in the state of Northern California is around this particular mountain, waiting to see one Lane Myer, tackle this totally untamed slope--dead or alive!"

MOtorboat
01-15-2008, 02:20 PM
I'm thinking Dogma?

"I'm telling you Lane, practically everybody in the state of Northern California is around this particular mountain, waiting to see one Lane Myer, tackle this totally untamed slope--dead or alive!"

Yes, and another classic.

Bethany: You were martyred?
Rufus: That's one way of putting it. Another way of putting it would be to say that I was bludgeoned to death by huge ******* rocks.

and...

Bethany: What exactly brought you to Illinois?
Jay: Some **** named John Hughes.
Bethany: "Sixteen Candles" John Hughes?
Jay: You know that guy, too? See, all these movies take place in a small town called Shermer, in Illinois, where all the honies are top-shelf, but all the dudes are whiny pussies - except for Judd Nelson, he was ******' harsh - but best of all, there was no one dealin', man; then, it hits me: we could live like phat rats if we were the blunt connection in Shermer, Illinois. So we collected some money we were owed, and we caught a bus. You know what the **** we found out when we got there? There is no Shermer in Illinois. Movies are ******' bull****.

Kapaibro
01-15-2008, 03:26 PM
Jay and Silent Bob make for classic quotes

Snoochy Boochy!

Skinny
01-15-2008, 07:02 PM
Forrest Gump ...
Jenny Curran ~ Have you ever been with a girl, Forrest?


Forrest Gump ~ I sit next to them in my Home Economics class all the time.

KCL
01-15-2008, 08:02 PM
Little Bill Daggett: Well, sir, you are a cowardly son of a *****! You just shot an unarmed man!
Will Munny: Well, he should have armed himself if he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend.

love that movie......

The line before that right before Eastwood shoots him..."Who owns this ****hole?":laugh:

sneakers
01-16-2008, 02:28 AM
Gord Brody: You can't have complaints there's not enough cheese in the cheese sandwiches. I mean, if there's no cheese in a cheese sandwich, that's basically just two slices of bread, and if word of that were to get out, well, I could lose my job! I could lose all of this! And we wouldn't want that, would we? Would we?! WOULD WE! HUH?!
Customer: What the **** am I gonna do with that?
Gord Brody: Well, you could stick it in your bum-bum.

From "freddy got fingered".

frauschieze
01-16-2008, 09:35 AM
I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that ****ed-up bar.

Cleveland Rocks
01-17-2008, 11:24 PM
Heineken?

%&*$ that $%^&!!! Pabst Blue Ribbon!!!

Another from same movie:

Frank Booth: Hey you wanna go for a ride?
Jeffrey Beaumont: No thanks.
Frank Booth: No thanks? What does that mean?
Jeffrey Beaumont: I don't wanna go.
Frank Booth: Go where?
Jeffrey Beaumont: For a ride.
Frank Booth: A ride! Now that's a good idea!

fcspikeit
01-18-2008, 01:43 AM
"What do you want John?"

"*Snarl* I want what every other man who came here and spilled his guts wants.. *Snarl again* For our country to love us, as much as we love it"

John Rambo - First Blood part 2 (Rambo 2)



"I must brake you!"

"Go For'it"

Ivan Drago & Rocky Balboa - Rocky 4





"Do one thing for me..(leans a little closer) WIN!"

"Well whata we waited foe"

Adrian Balboa & Mickey - Rocky 2




"Have you ever danced with the devil in the pail moon light?"

The Joker - Batman

G_Money
01-23-2008, 04:37 PM
V: Good evening, London. Allow me first to apologize for this interruption. I do, like many of you, appreciate the comforts of every day routine- the security of the familiar, the tranquility of repetition. I enjoy them as much as any bloke. But in the spirit of commemoration, thereby those important events of the past usually associated with someone's death or the end of some awful bloody struggle, a celebration of a nice holiday, I thought we could mark this November the 5th, a day that is sadly no longer remembered, by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat. There are of course those who do not want us to speak. I suspect even now, orders are being shouted into telephones, and men with guns will soon be on their way. Why? Because while the truncheon may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power. Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country, isn't there? Cruelty and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission. How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror. I know why you did it. I know you were afraid. Who wouldn't be? War, terror, disease. There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your common sense. Fear got the best of you, and in your panic you turned to the now high chancellor, Adam Sutler. He promised you order, he promised you peace, and all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent. Last night I sought to end that silence. Last night I destroyed the Old Bailey, to remind this country of what it has forgotten. More than four hundred years ago a great citizen wished to embed the fifth of November forever in our memory. His hope was to remind the world that fairness, justice, and freedom are more than words, they are perspectives. So if you've seen nothing, if the crimes of this government remain unknown to you then I would suggest you allow the fifth of November to pass unmarked. But if you see what I see, if you feel as I feel, and if you would seek as I seek, then I ask you to stand beside me one year from tonight, outside the gates of Parliament, and together we shall give them a fifth of November that shall never, ever be forgot.

Andy Dufresne: Get busy living, or get busy dying.

~G

Broncospsycho77
01-23-2008, 06:18 PM
How about a holidays classic? A Christmas Story:

Ralphie: Oooh fuuudge!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Only I didn't say "Fudge." I said THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word!
Mr. Parker: [stunned] *What* did you say?
Ralphie: Uh, um...
Mr. Parker: That's... what I thought you said. Get in the car. Go on!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] It was all over - I was dead. What would it be? The guillotine? Hanging? The chair? The rack? The Chinese water torture? Hmmph. Mere child's play compared to what surely awaited me.
----------------------
Mother: All right. Now, are you ready to tell me where you heard that word?
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master. But, I chickened out and said the first name that came to mind.
--------------------
Mr. Parker: Fra-gee-lay. That must be Italian.
Mrs. Parker: Uh, I think that says FRAGILE, dear.
Mr. Parker: Oh, yeah.

:lol:

dogfish
01-23-2008, 11:07 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ox6JMo0ounI


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17ei07jdKng

dogfish
01-23-2008, 11:08 PM
"what would i do if i had a million dollars? i'll tell ya, man. two chicks at the same time."


"i'll make him an offer he can't refuse"

MOtorboat
01-23-2008, 11:39 PM
"what would i do if i had a million dollars? i'll tell ya, man. two chicks at the same time."


"i'll make him an offer he can't refuse"

"Chicks that would double up on a dude like me do."

Italianmobstr7
01-24-2008, 02:14 PM
Vince Vaughn- The Breakup - Fate has me highly skilled and loaded with talent. From when he's demoloshing some 12 year old kid on Madden.

Italianmobstr7
01-24-2008, 02:46 PM
Vince Vaughn in Wedding Crashers- Janice, I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair.

BigDaddyBronco
01-24-2008, 03:05 PM
Jack Torrance: Wendy.
Wendy Torrance: Stay away.
Jack Torrance: Darling. Light, of my life. I'm not gonna hurt ya. You didn't let me finish my sentence. I said, I'm not gonna hurt ya. I'm just gonna bash your brains in. I'm gonna bash 'em right the **** in. Ha, ha.

DallasChief
01-24-2008, 03:10 PM
Bobbie (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000268/): I need a life.
Jonathan (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000197/): Get a job!
Bobbie (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000268/): I don't want a job. I want you.
Jonathan (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000197/): I'm taken, by me. Get out of the house, do something useful, Goddammit.
Jonathan (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000197/): You want a job? I got a job for you. Fix up this pigsty! You get a pretty Goddammed good salary for testing out this bed all day! You want an extra fifty dollars a week, try vacuuming! You want an extra hundred, make this Goddammed bed! Try opening some Goddammed windows! That's why you can't stand up in here, the Goddammed place smells like a coffin!

In-com-plete
01-24-2008, 03:13 PM
Here's a few of my favorites:

I think you got the wrong impression of me. I think in all fairness, I should explain to you exactly what it is that I do. For instance.....tomorrow morning I'll get up nice and early, take a walk down over to the bank, and.....walk in and see ya and.....if you don't have my money for me.....I'll crack your ******' head wide open in front of everybody in the bank.

And just about the time that I'm comin' out of jail.....hopefully you'll be coming out of your coma. And guess what? I'll split your ******' head open again. Cause I'm ******' stupid! I don't give a **** about jail. That's my business. That's what I do!


Fear causes hesitation, and hesitation will cause your worst fears to come true.


Look it, I'm not gonna bull**** you OK? I don't give a good **** what you know or don't know. But I'm gonna torture you anyway.....regardless. Not to get information. It's amusing.....to me, to torture a cop. You can say anything you want 'cause I've heard it all before. All you can do is.....pray for a quick death.....which.....you ain't gonna get.


I told 'em not to touch the alarm. They touched it. If they hadn't done what I told 'em not to do.....they'd still be alive.


Did you guys know, that the average penis size is 6.4 inches? That the average vaginal canal is 7.9 inches? Therefore, in this country alone, there's over 17,000 miles of unused, virgin *****.


Nicholson: You just made it big time.
Nicky Dimes: You're no longer an extra...
Nicholson: ...or a bit player...
Nicky Dimes: ...or a supporting actor...
Nicholson: ...you're a ******* star. You are a ******* star. And you are going to be playing your one-man show for the next two ******* years for a captive audience. And listen to this, you get out in a few years and meet some old lady, get married, and you'll be so understanding to your wife's needs because you'll know what it feels like to be a woman.
Nicky Dimes: Of course, you'll only want to **** her in the ass because that ***** wont be tight enough anymore.

Ricky
01-24-2008, 03:38 PM
Frenchman: "I fart in your general direction."

dogfish
01-24-2008, 04:26 PM
Frenchman: "I fart in your general direction."

"your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!"

Ricky
01-24-2008, 04:34 PM
"Your arm, it's gone."
"No it's not. It still there."
"No, I cut it off."
"Mearly a flesh wound."

dogfish
01-24-2008, 04:46 PM
"i'm not dead yet!"

Broncospsycho77
01-24-2008, 04:52 PM
Vince Vaughn/Ben Stiller in Dodgeball

White Goodman: Go ahead, make your jokes, Mr. Jokey... Joke-maker. But let me hit you with some knowledge. Quit now. Save yourself the embarrassment of losing with these losers in Las Vegas, La Fleur.
Peter La Fleur: Alliteration aside, I'll take my chances in the tournament.
White Goodman: Yeah, you will take your chances.
Peter La Fleur: I know. I just said that.
White Goodman: I know you just said that.
Peter La Fleur: Okay, I'm not sure where you're going with this.
White Goodman: Well, I'm not sure where *you're* going with this.
Peter La Fleur: That's what I said.
White Goodman: That's what I'm saying to *you*.
Peter La Fleur: All right.
White Goodman: ...TouchÈ.

DenverBronkHoes
01-24-2008, 07:06 PM
"i dont like your jerk off name, i dont like your jerk off face, i dont like your jerk off attitude, and i dont like you....... JERK OFF!"



"oo i bet she gives great helmet"



"claire... would you like to see a picture of a guy with elephantitus on his nutts?.. its pretty tasty......How do you think he rides a bike?....... uhh Claire?.. would you consider dating a guy like this?.. i mean if he had nice clothes, money, nice car... only on a date you would hhave ride in the back becuz his nutts would ride shotgun"

In-com-plete
01-25-2008, 08:42 AM
Vince Vaughn- The Breakup - Fate has me highly skilled and loaded with talent. From when he's demoloshing some 12 year old kid on Madden.

"I think im good enough to figure out how to beat myself."

Italianmobstr7
01-29-2008, 10:27 AM
Here's the deal I'm the best there is. Plain and simple. I wake up in the morning and i piss excellence - Will Ferrell- Talladega Nights

DallasChief
01-29-2008, 11:57 AM
Smokey (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000676/): Older the berry, the sweeter the juice.
Craig Jones (http://imdb.com/name/nm0001084/): Man, it's the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice.
Smokey (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000676/): Yeah, well she blacker than a mother****** too.

Coast Guard
01-29-2008, 07:40 PM
One Ping...One Ping Only...

Thnikkaman
01-30-2008, 07:23 PM
"hey hey,
ho ho,
this penis party's got to go."

Droz: Are we having a party tonight or what?
Cecilia: Well, there's no publicity, so there's no people; Gutter never showed up, so there's no beer; instruments just blew out, so there's no band; and I think Raji and Deege may be dead.
Droz: Wait a minute... no beer? Well, where the hell's Gutter?
Katy: Probably in a parking lot somewhere picking his nose.
[cut to Gutter in a parking lot somewhere picking his nose]

Droz: Ok, now it's true, the majority of students today are so cravenly PC, they wouldn't know a good time if it was sitting on their face, but there's one thing that will always unite us and them. They're young. They may not realize it yet. They've got the same raging hormones, the same self-destructive desire to get boldly trashed and wildly out of control. Look out that window! That's not a protest! That is cry for help! They're begging us...
[shouts]
Droz: Please have a party! Feed us drinks!
[Continues shouting]
Droz: Get us laid! Aahhhhhh!

jrelway
01-31-2008, 09:27 PM
mongol general: "conan, what is best in life!"

conan: "crush enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lementations of the women"

mongol general : "that is good"

Cleveland Rocks
01-31-2008, 11:51 PM
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y200/charlesanselmo/7.jpg

I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it? It's like when you put your head to the grass and you can hear the growin' and you can hear the insects. Do you like Beethoven?

dogfish
02-01-2008, 04:19 PM
"diamonds are supposed to be colorless! you go out and you buy a colored diamond for a girl you're not even seein' any more. . . . i think you been eatin' retard sandwiches!"

dogfish
02-01-2008, 09:07 PM
damn, how could i forget one of my favorites? :tsk:


"this is ohio-- if you don't have a brewski in your hand you might as well be wearing a dress. . . "

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 01:36 AM
German accent: My grandfather, Adolph Norbecker, said to me once the secret of a great beer; All beer is essentially fermented, piss colored water. The secret to a great beer ..... is ADVERTISING!


Norbecker light, you can take it in the bottle, or you can take it in the can!

Whip out your Norbecker .... whip it out!

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 01:38 AM
Ray?......... THIS IS WALTER!!!!!!

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 01:39 AM
i heard a rumor that you raided Barry Manilow's closet....

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 01:42 AM
(johnson)im a fuggin idiot cuz i cant make a lamp?
(bender)no your a genius cuz u cant make a lamp
(johnson)well what do u know about trigonometry?
(bender)i can care less about trigonometry
(johnson)well did u know with trigonometry there would be no engineering
(bender)and without lamps, there'd be no light!!!


B-club

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 01:42 AM
monet really pumps my nads

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 01:43 AM
What if your house.... what if your dope was on fire?

impossible sir..... its in Johnson's underwear...

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 01:45 AM
I can assure you I mean you no harm.

Who are you?

Who? Who is but the form following the function of what and what I am is a man in a mask.

Well I can see that.

Of course you can. I'm not questioning your powers of observation I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is.

Oh..... Right.

But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace sobriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatis persona.
Voilà!
In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition.
The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.
Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.

Are you like a crazy person?

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 01:56 AM
Christopher Walken: Sicilians are great liars. The best in the world. I'm Sicilian. My father was the world heavy-weight champion of Sicilian liars. From growing up with him I learned the pantomime. There are seventeen different things a guy can do when he lies to give himself away. A guys got seventeen pantomimes. A woman's got twenty, but a guy's got seventeen... but, if you know them, like you know your own face, they beat lie detectors all to hell. Now, what we got here is a little game of show and tell. You don't wanna show me nothin', but you're tellin me everything. I know you know where they are, so tell me before I do some damage you won't walk away from.

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 02:00 AM
Captain Koons: The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any slopes gonna put their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright, so he hid it, in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you.

keithbishop
02-02-2008, 04:25 AM
Once upon a Time in the West--

Harmonica (Charles Bronson) : And Frank?
Snaky (Jack Elam): Frank sent us.
Harmonica: Did you bring a horse for me?
Snaky: Well... looks like we're...
[snickers]
Snaky: ...looks like we're shy one horse.
Harmonica: You brought two too many.




Morton: Not bad. Congratulations. Tell me, was it necessary that you kill all of them? I only told you to scare them.
Frank (Henry Fonda) : People scare better when they're dying.



Harmonica: I saw three of these dusters a short time ago, they were waiting for a train. Inside the dusters, there were three men.
Cheyenne (Jason Robards, Jr.) : So?
Harmonica: Inside the men, there were three bullets.



The Pink Panther Strikes Back--

Clouseau: Does your dog bite?
Hotel Clerk: No.
Clouseau: Nice doggie.
[Dog barks and bites Clouseau in the hand]
Clouseau: I thought you said your dog did not bite!
Hotel Clerk: That is not my dog.



Clouseau: You have received a beump on the head.
Dreyfus: Beump?
Clouseau: What?
Dreyfus: You said beump.
Clouseau: Yes, I know that. It is a large beump. You could receive the concussion from such a beump.


Clouseau: [chatting with Scotland Yard about sniffing out Dreyfus, who now has Europe's most infamous hitmen working for him] Of course it won't be easy; nothing worthwhile ever is. That is why I have always failed where others have succeeded.



[B]Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid--

Butch Cassidy: Then you jump first.
Sundance Kid: No, I said.
Butch Cassidy: What's the matter with you?
Sundance Kid: I can't swim.
Butch Cassidy: Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill you.


Planet of the Apes--

[the first words ever spoken by a human to the apes]
George Taylor: Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 04:41 AM
Christopher Walken: Sicilians are great liars. The best in the world. I'm Sicilian. My father was the world heavy-weight champion of Sicilian liars. From growing up with him I learned the pantomime. There are seventeen different things a guy can do when he lies to give himself away. A guys got seventeen pantomimes. A woman's got twenty, but a guy's got seventeen... but, if you know them, like you know your own face, they beat lie detectors all to hell. Now, what we got here is a little game of show and tell. You don't wanna show me nothin', but you're tellin me everything. I know you know where they are, so tell me before I do some damage you won't walk away from.

great fking movie dude........one of the all time greatest movie scenes ever right there

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 04:44 AM
You see this watch? .... This watch cost more than your car.....

1st place is a brand new Cadillac... second is place set of steak knives.... Third place is YOUR FIRED.....

always be closing


-glengary glenross


another all time greatest scene

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 04:45 AM
MHW....

we both have similar tastes in movies....

BTW.... 4 Rooms is on...... ever catch that 1?

dogfish
02-02-2008, 04:51 AM
tasty taste: (sings) "i want to make you mine, slap that fat behind, tie you down and make you whine. . . i want you to scratch my itch, and be my bitch -- 'cause i love you, girl!"

ice cold: "you see, that just shows his whole. . . vulnerability!"

tone deaf: "the black man was the first sensitive man, long before alan alda. . . "



nina: (quoting lyrics) "he'll rip you off, take your money, make you work for free-- 'cause he's the devil, see. . . kill whitey!"

ice cold: "see? now how could you listen to that and say we's advocatin' all killin' white people?"

tasty taste: "yea-- we was talkin' about one SPECIFIC whitey-- whitey deluca, our ex-manager. . . he ripped us off for about ten G's. . . "

ice cold: "and he wasn't really even white-- he was one of them olive-complected mutha ******!"

tasty taste: "do i look like the kinda ***** that could kill a whole BUNCHA white people?? i mean, given a reason maybe-- but not on a whim!"



ice cold: "see, they wanted to say that black people was all lazy and didn't wanna work and stuff, but you try carryin' a sofa from slawson and crenshaw down to pecoe and venice, then goin' back for the matching end tables-- especially through all that smoke and shit. . . that's some work fo yo ass-- even with three *****s!"

nina: "so were you, as they say, "down" with the riots?"

ice cold: "oh, yea, definitely!"

tasty taste: "yea, but we was outta town when they happened. . . that brotha on TV? he only looked like me. . . ."




from fear of a black hat-- one of the best comedies ever made. . . . :2thumbs:

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 04:51 AM
The fight..... where does it come from and why do we do it. A man... alone on the universe. A punk also alone in the universe..............

skin heads beat up the punks, the punks beat up the metal heads, the metal heads beat up the new wavers, and the new wavers didnt beat up anyone.... they were the new hippies

- SLC Punk is a great flick

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 04:52 AM
dog......fish

u cant possibly be sober and still up right now....

trooper....

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 10:16 AM
MHW....

we both have similar tastes in movies....

BTW.... 4 Rooms is on...... ever catch that 1?

Yup, saw it was on but got too late for me last night.

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father ... prepare to die.

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 02:00 PM
Yup, saw it was on but got too late for me last night.

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father ... prepare to die.

billy crystal played aother great jewish role in that movie as the old raunchy medicine guy....

i cant really think of a good quote from that 1 though....


u are the 6 fingered man

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 02:03 PM
What happen where are they?

I dont know sir, they have hyperjets on that thing..

And what do we got on this thing a Cuisinart?!

No sir

Well find them, catch them!!

Yes sir..... prepare ship for light speeed...

No no... light speed is too slow...

Light speed to slow?

Yes.... were gunna have to go right to.... LUDICROUS SPEED!

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 02:32 PM
Only one person would dare give me the raspberry .... lonestar.

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 02:36 PM
Inconceivable!

You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means.

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 02:38 PM
1...... 1,1,
2......2,2
3......3,3,
4......4,4
.....................(sigh) 5.... 5,5,

so the combination is, 1,2,3,4,5.... (open helmet)?

thats the stupidest combination i ever heard in my entire life! Thats the kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage....

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 02:39 PM
radar, about to be jammed

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 02:47 PM
I knew it! I'm surrounded by ***holes!

Keep firing ***holes!

DenverBronkHoes
02-02-2008, 03:46 PM
I cant believe it.... what the hell am i looking at?

your looking at now sir... everything thats happening now, is happeniong now.

what happen to then?

we missed then..

when?

just now!

Were at now NOW..

go back to then

When?

Now

NOW?

NOW!

i cant

why

we missed it...


lol

dogfish
02-02-2008, 04:34 PM
dog......fish

u cant possibly be sober and still up right now....

trooper....


who said anything about sober. . . . ?

dogfish
02-02-2008, 04:55 PM
"i think it's wonderful what you did-- now maniacs will think twice before going crazy. . . "

- he was a quiet man




:laugh: :laugh:

Tned
02-02-2008, 05:04 PM
Jurassic Park:

Goldblums' character Malcolm, "your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should"

I think this is a phrase that is very appropriate, and I have used to drive home points, when making business decisions. Sometimes people get so focused on the 'can we' they lose sight of the 'should we'.

MileHighWrath
02-02-2008, 10:53 PM
Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man.

Broncospsycho77
02-02-2008, 10:56 PM
Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Sloane: What are we going to do?
Ferris: The question isn't "what are we going to do," the question is "what aren't we going to do?"
Cameron: Please don't say were not going to take the car home. Please don't say were not going to take the car home. Please don't say were not going to take the car home.
Ferris: [to the camera] If you had access to a car like this, would you take it back right away?
Ferris: Neither would I.
-----------------------
Economics Teacher (Ben Stein): In 1930, the Republican-controlled House of Representatives, in an effort to alleviate the effects of the... Anyone? Anyone?... the Great Depression, passed the... Anyone? Anyone? The tariff bill? The Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act? Which, anyone? Raised or lowered?... raised tariffs, in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government. Did it work? Anyone? Anyone know the effects? It did not work, and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression. Today we have a similar debate over this. Anyone know what this is? Class? Anyone? Anyone?

Italianmobstr7
02-03-2008, 01:21 PM
From Wedding Crashers:

Jeremy Grey (Vince Vaughn)- " Oh so Mr. Environmentalist is also a hunter?"
Sack (Bradley Cooper)- "I hunt quail Jeremy! They're overpopulated in this region and they're decimating the grub worm population! You got a f****** PROBLEM WITH THAT???!!!"
Jeremy Grey- "Not as much as I do with your attire, or just your general point of view toward everybody here. But hey, lets go kill some birds. I'm psyched."

Italianmobstr7
02-03-2008, 02:00 PM
Wedding Crashers:

Jeremy Grey (Vince Vaughn): Have you ever shot one of these things before?
John Beckwith (Owen Wilson): The whole 17 years we've known each other I've been sneaking off to go on little hunting trips around the world. No, I don't even know what the f*** a quail is!
Jeremy Grey: I look totally ridiculous. Like why do I have to be in camouflage? So the big bad quail doesn't see me?
John Beckwith: I know. Why can't we hunt something cool like a hawk or an eagle, something with some talons?
Jeremy Grey: That'd be awesome. We could get something like big game. Even like a gorilla or a rhinoceros or a f****** human being! That'll get you jacked up.
John Beckwith: That's a little heavy.
Jeremy Grey: I mean like, hunt a human being right now, "Most Dangerous Game". Like a worthy adversary. Not a human being that's armed, but a clever, a clever, human being who knows the jungle. Or the woods.

MOtorboat
02-03-2008, 05:39 PM
Coach Boone: OK, we're in a fight. You boys are doing all that you can do. Anybody can see that. Win or lose, we're goinna walk out of this stadium tonight with our head held high. Do your best, that's all anybody can ask for.

Julius: No it ain't, coach. With all due respect, you demanded more of us, you demanded perfection. Now I ain't saying I'm perfect, cause I'm not, and I ain't never gonna be. None of us are. But, we have won every single game we have played till now, so this team is perfect. We stepped out on that field that way tonight, and if it's all the same to you coach Boone, that's how we wanna leave it.

claymore
02-03-2008, 05:42 PM
Wedding Crashers:

Jeremy Grey (Vince Vaughn): Have you ever shot one of these things before?
John Beckwith (Owen Wilson): The whole 17 years we've known each other I've been sneaking off to go on little hunting trips around the world. No, I don't even know what the f*** a quail is!
Jeremy Grey: I look totally ridiculous. Like why do I have to be in camouflage? So the big bad quail doesn't see me?
John Beckwith: I know. Why can't we hunt something cool like a hawk or an eagle, something with some talons?
Jeremy Grey: That'd be awesome. We could get something like big game. Even like a gorilla or a rhinoceros or a f****** human being! That'll get you jacked up.
John Beckwith: That's a little heavy.
Jeremy Grey: I mean like, hunt a human being right now, "Most Dangerous Game". Like a worthy adversary. Not a human being that's armed, but a clever, a clever, human being who knows the jungle. Or the woods.

LMMFAO!

MileHighWrath
02-04-2008, 12:39 AM
I'll be back.

DenverBronkHoes
02-04-2008, 12:42 AM
if anyone wants to type out the scene from UNCLE BUCK with Candy and Kaulkin talking to eachother.....

hilarious

DenverBronkHoes
02-04-2008, 12:43 AM
sorry.. im high AND lazy tonight

MileHighWrath
02-04-2008, 12:45 AM
wake up hoes!

DenverBronkHoes
02-04-2008, 12:50 AM
i did alot today..... work.... moms house... more work.... super bowl.....

currently working.............. and doing bonghits

MileHighWrath
02-04-2008, 12:52 AM
WTF movie is that from?

DenverBronkHoes
02-04-2008, 01:36 AM
WTF movie is that from?

lol... that was the movie about Hoes..... lol

that jus me there man...

MileHighWrath
02-04-2008, 10:35 AM
lol... that was the movie about Hoes..... lol

that jus me there man...

Yeah, we need a sarcastic smiley. :confused:

Thnikkaman
02-04-2008, 11:50 AM
if anyone wants to type out the scene from UNCLE BUCK with Candy and Kaulkin talking to eachother.....

hilarious

This is all you need to know, and is probably less effort than your post.

Go to imdb.com
look up the movie
go to quotes
highlight quote
ctrl+c
Come to this site
ctrl+v

DallasChief
02-04-2008, 11:58 AM
I love you more than bears love honey.
I love you more than Jews love money.
I love you more than Asians are good at math.
I love you even if it's not hip.
I love you more than black people don't tip.
I love you more than Puerto Ricans need baths.
I love you more than girls love dolls.
I love you more than dogs love balls.
I love you more than the white stuff in a zit.
I love you like Gary Busey.
I love you more than dykes love *****.
I love you more than my after-show monster bong hit...

DenverBronkHoes
02-05-2008, 11:50 AM
Hey everyone...... were all gonna get LAID!!!!




50 bucks says the shmails kid picks his nose



50 bucks says he eats it


lol

Den21vsBal19
02-05-2008, 12:40 PM
Hedley Lamarr (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0466327/): Qualifications?
Applicant: Rape, murder, arson, and rape.
Hedley Lamarr (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0466327/): You said rape twice.
Applicant: I like rape.

Fantastic movie :laugh:

I also like Slim Pickens line about 'dancing round like Kansas City queers'.
One of those films that I can just watch over and over whilst splitting my sides :laugh:


But my current favourite, has been for a few years, is Chris Walken (always a scary individual) as Rayburn in Man On Fire


A man can be an artist... in anything, food, whatever. It depends on how good he is at it. Creasey's art is death. He's about to paint his masterpiece.

NightTrainLayne
02-05-2008, 01:00 PM
Fantastic movie :laugh:

I also like Slim Pickens line about 'dancing round like Kansas City queers'.
One of those films that I can just watch over and over whilst splitting my sides :laugh:


But my current favourite, has been for a few years, is Chris Walken (always a scary individual) as Rayburn in Man On Fire

That was quite a masterpiece. . .Really good movie.

MileHighWrath
02-05-2008, 02:23 PM
What are you, f'ing retarded?

Do you want me to be f'ing retarded?

DenverBronkHoes
02-05-2008, 10:23 PM
well if it isnt Lonestar and his sidekick PUKE!!

Thnikkaman
02-05-2008, 10:37 PM
Burger Shack Employee: Ding-dong! May I interject for a second? As a Burger Shack employee for the past three years, if there's one thing I've learned, it's that if you're craving White Castle, the burgers here just don't cut it. In fact, just thinking about those tender little White Castle burgers with those little, itty-bitty grilled onions that just explode in your mouth like flavor crystals every time you bite into one... just makes me want to burn this mother****** down. Come on, Pookie, let's burn this mother****** down! Come on, Pookie! Let's burn it, Pookie! Let's burn this mother****** down! Let's burn it down! Let's burn it! So you guys maybe should just suck it up and go to White Castle.
Kumar: You can always get your work done in the car.
Harold: Let's do it.
Kumar: All right. Awesome. Then listen, listen - no matter what, we are not ending this night without White Castle in our stomachs. Agreed?
Harold: Agreed.
[shakes Kumar's hand then gives him pound]
Burger Shack Employee: Wise choice. You guys might have wanted to stay away from our special sauce tonight. Me and Pookie, we added a secret ingredient. I'll give you a hint. It's semen.
[bursts out laughing]
Harold: [Smirks] Semen.
Burger Shack Employee: Animal semen.
[Harold and Kumar scream and drive off as fast as possible]

Thnikkaman
02-05-2008, 10:40 PM
Harold: So what are you in here for?
Tarik: For being black.
Harold: Seriously.
Tarik: I am serious. You wanna know what happened. I was walking out of a Barnes & Noble, and a cop stops me. Evidently, a black guy robbed a storein Newark. I told him, "I haven't even been to Newark in months." So he starts beating me with his gun, telling me to stop resisting arrest.
Harold: Holy shit! What'd you do?
Tarik: I kept saying, "I understand I'm under arrest. Now please stop beating me."
Harold: I don't understand how you can be so calm about all this.
Tarik: Look at me. I'm fat, black, can't dance, and I have two gay fathers. People have been messing with me my whole life. I learned a long time ago there's no sense getting all riled up every time a bunch of idiots give you a hard time. In the end, the universe tends to unfold as it should. Plus I have a really large penis. That keeps me happy.

MileHighWrath
02-05-2008, 10:43 PM
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me.

Thnikkaman
02-05-2008, 10:53 PM
Bullets - my only weakness! How did you know?

DenverBronkHoes
02-05-2008, 10:57 PM
Big bear.... Big bear chase.... Big bear chase me!!!

SoCalBronco
02-06-2008, 01:00 AM
well if it isnt Lonestar and his sidekick PUKE!!

"I'm a Mog. Half man, half dog... I'm My own best friend."

DenverBronkHoes
02-06-2008, 01:21 AM
Lord Helmet!!!...

What!

Your needed on the bridge Sir..

Knock next time knock when my door is closed.... did you see anything?

No sir... i didnt see you playing with your dolls again..

Good!

DenverBronkHoes
02-06-2008, 01:22 AM
and if at all possible.... try to save the car...


Druish

In-com-plete
02-08-2008, 09:34 AM
You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me....Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with nail polish. These ******* amateurs.


Mike: So how long do I wait to call?
Trent: A day.
Mike: Tomorrow.
Sue: Tomorrow, then a day.
Trent: Yeah.
Mike: So two days?
Trent: Yeah, I guess you could call it that, two days.
Sue: Definitely, two days is like industry standard.
Trent: You know I used to wait two days to call anybody, but now it's like everyone in town waits two days. So I think three days is kind of money. What do you think?
Sue: Yeah, but two's enough not to look anxious.
Trent: But I think three days is kind of money. You know because you...
Mike: Yeah, but you know what, mabey I'll wait 3 weeks. How's that? And tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and I just happened to run into her number.
Charles: Then ask her where you met her.
Mike: Yeah, I'll ask her where I met her. I don't remember. What does she look like? And then I'll asked if we ******. Is that... would that be... T, would that be the money?
Trent: You know what. Ha ha ha Mike, laugh all you want but if you call too soon you might scare off a nice baby who's ready to party.
Mike: Well how long are you guys gonna wait to call your babies?
Trent, Sue: Six days.


Look, we're gonna spend half the night driving around the Hills looking for this one party and you're going to say it sucks and we're all gonna leave and then we're gonna go look for this other party. But all the parties and all the bars, they all suck. I spend half the night talking to some girl who's looking around the room to see if there's somebody else who's more important she should be talking to. And it's like I'm supposed to be all happy 'cause she's wearing a backpack, you know? And half of them are just nasty skanks who wouldn't be nothing except they're surrounded by a bunch of drunken horny ass holes.


Neal: He says we're going the wrong way.
Del: Oh, he's drunk. How would he know where we're going?


State Trooper: What the hell are you driving here?
Del: We had a small fire last night, but we caught it in the nick of time.
State Trooper: Do you have any idea how fast you were going?
Del: Funny enough, I was just talking to my friend about that. Our speedometer has melted and as a result it's very hard to see with any degree of accuracy exactly how fast we were going.

MileHighWrath
02-08-2008, 10:02 AM
Open Bar Dude!

DallasChief
02-08-2008, 10:08 AM
Clementine: And in your little brain. You try to figure out, "Did she **** someone tonight?"
Joel: No, see Clem. I assume you ****** someone tonight. Isnt that how you get people to like you?

MileHighWrath
02-08-2008, 10:19 AM
Now the first time you kill somebody, that's the hardest. I don't give a shit if you're ****in' Wyatt Earp or Jack the Ripper. Remember that guy in Texas? The guy up in that ****in' tower that killed all them people? I'll bet you green money that first little black dot he took a bead on, that was the bitch of the bunch. First one is tough, no ****in' foolin'. The second one... the second one ain't no ****in' Mardis Gras either, but it's better than the first one 'cause you still feel the same thing, y'know... except it's more diluted, y'know it's... it's better. I threw up on the first one, you believe that? Then the third one... the third one is easy, you level right off. It's no problem. Now... sh*t... now I do it just to watch their ****in' expression change.

In-com-plete
02-08-2008, 10:27 AM
Now the first time you kill somebody, that's the hardest. I don't give a shit if you're ****in' Wyatt Earp or Jack the Ripper. Remember that guy in Texas? The guy up in that ****in' tower that killed all them people? I'll bet you green money that first little black dot he took a bead on, that was the bitch of the bunch. First one is tough, no ****in' foolin'. The second one... the second one ain't no ****in' Mardis Gras either, but it's better than the first one 'cause you still feel the same thing, y'know... except it's more diluted, y'know it's... it's better. I threw up on the first one, you believe that? Then the third one... the third one is easy, you level right off. It's no problem. Now... sh*t... now I do it just to watch their ****in' expression change.

Great movie!

Cleveland Rocks
02-08-2008, 10:29 AM
Great movie!

Aye True Romance is one of my favorites.

DenverBronkHoes
02-10-2008, 09:44 PM
you Said It Was A Good Size!!!!!

DenverBronkHoes
02-10-2008, 09:45 PM
your part eggplant!

Thnikkaman
02-10-2008, 10:03 PM
Dante Hicks: 37! My girlfriend's sucked 37 dicks!
Customer with Diapers: In a row?

fcspikeit
02-10-2008, 10:29 PM
Dan Mott: The only chance we have to survive is to huddle together for warmth...
Jerry Conlaine: I, for one, choose death.


Jerry Conlaine: Well I was a boyscout, you were a boyscout too right Tom?
Tom Marshall: No but I ate a brownie once.

Dan Mott: What are you doing?
Jerry Conlaine: Taking off my shoes
Dan Mott: Why?
Jerry Conlaine: Because I run faster with no shoes
Dan Mott: You can't out-run that bear!
Jerry Conlaine: I dont have to out-run the bear, I just have to out-run you!

River Guide: So... are you a class... 4,5?
Tom Marshall: Yeah? Yeah? Why don't you try to put those numbers together. Yeah. I shot a class 45, and haven't lost a man yet.
River Guide: Lie to me! I don't care. I'm not the one who's going to drown.

Benetto
02-10-2008, 10:42 PM
wedding crashers - Let's play a little game called 'just the tip.' Just to see if it feels good.

Den21vsBal19
02-11-2008, 09:22 AM
You're gonna need a bigger boat.

fcspikeit
02-11-2008, 03:14 PM
The Punisher: Si vis pacem, para bellum. If you want peace, prepare for war.

Frank Castle: It's been five months since my family was killed. I don't see ONE man in jail.
Police Chief Morris: Obviously you're upset...
Frank Castle: Upset? Is that the word? I used to get upset. When I got a flat tire, when a plane was delayed. I used to get *upset* when the Yankees won the series. So if that's what upset means, what am I feeling now? If you know the word, tell me because I don't.

Frank Castle: In certain, extreme situations, the law is inadequate. In order to shame its inadequacy, it is necessary to act outside the law. To pursue - natural justice. This is not vengeance. Revenge is not a valid motive, it's an emotional response. No, not vengeance. Punishment.


The Punisher: I have work to do. Read your newspaper everyday and you'll understand.
Joan: Which section?
The Punisher: The obituaries.


Joan: What makes you any different from them?
The Punisher: They have something to lose.

fcspikeit
02-11-2008, 03:18 PM
Trautman: John where are you going?
Rambo: I don't know.
Trautman: You get a second medal of honor for this.
[Rambo looks over at the rescued POWs]
Rambo: You should give it to them. They deserve it more.
Trautman: You don't belong here why don't you come back with me?
Rambo: Back to what? My friends died here, let me die here.
Trautman: The war, the whole conflict may have been wrong but damn it don't hate your country for it.
Rambo: Hate? I'd die for it.
Trautman: Then what is it you want?
Rambo: I want, what they want, and every other guy who came over here and spilled his guts and gave everything he had, wants! For our country to love us as much as we love it! That's what I want!
Trautman: How will you live, John?
Rambo: Day by day.


Rambo: Murdock...
Trautman: He's here.
Murdock: Rambo, this is Murdock, we're glad you're alive. Where the hell are you? Give us your position and we'll come to pick you up!
Rambo: Murdock... I'm coming to get you!


Murdock: "Colonel are you sure Rambo's still in balance with the war? We can't afford having him involved in this mission and than crack in the pressure of that hell."
Trautman: "Pressure? Let me just say that Rambo is the best combat vet I've ever seen. A pure fighting machine with only a desire - to win a war that someone else lost. And if winning means he has to die - he'll die. No fear, no regrets. And one more thing, what you choose to call hell, he calls home."

Watchthemiddle
02-11-2008, 04:10 PM
"I'll be your Huckleberry"

DenverBronkHoes
02-11-2008, 06:46 PM
get the honey junior!!!!



(are there any FATSO fans out there?)

frauschieze
02-11-2008, 06:48 PM
I am smitten. I am in deep smit.

DenverBronkHoes
02-11-2008, 08:08 PM
Who the hell are you? Wheres Berney!!



lol.... great flick

fcspikeit
02-12-2008, 04:35 PM
Princess Isabelle: The king desires peace.
William Wallace: Longshanks desires peace?
Princess Isabelle: He declares it to me, I swear it. He proposes that you withdraw your attack. In return he grants you title, estates, and this chest of gold which I am to pay to you personally.
William Wallace: A lordship and titles. Gold. That I should become Judas?
Princess Isabelle: Peace is made in such ways.
William Wallace: Slaves are made in such ways. The last time Longshanks spoke of peace I was a boy. And many Scottish nobles, who would not be slaves, were lured by him under a flag of truce to a barn, where he had them hanged. I was very young, but I remember Longshank's notion of peace.


Princess Isabelle: I understand you have suffered. I know... about your woman.
William Wallace: [pauses, then sighs sadly] She was my wife. We married in secret because I would not share her with an English lord. They killed her to get to me. I've never spoken of it, I don't know why I tell you now, except... I see her strength in you. One day, you will be a queen. And you must open your eyes.
[regains composure, speaks firmly]
William Wallace: You tell your king that William Wallace will NOT be ruled... and nor will any Scot while I live.


Princess Isabelle: You see? Death comes to us all. But before it comes to you, know this: your blood dies with you. A child who is not of your line grows in my belly. Your son will not sit long on the throne. I swear it.



Princess Isabelle: I understand you have recently been given the rank of knight.
William Wallace: I have been given nothing. God makes men what they are.


I need to watch this movie again!

Broncospsycho77
02-12-2008, 04:42 PM
Major League:

Rick Vaughn: What's that shit on your chest?
Eddie Harris: [wiping his finger across his chest] Crisco?
Eddie Harris: [wiping it across his waist line]
Eddie Harris: Bardol?
Eddie Harris: [wiping it along his head]
Eddie Harris: Vagisil. Any one of them will give you another two to three inches drop on your curve ball. Of course if the umps are watching me real close I'll rub a little jalapeo up my nose, get it runnin', and if I need to load the ball up I just...
Eddie Harris: [wipes his nose]
Eddie Harris: ...wipe my nose.
Rick Vaughn: You put snot on the ball?
Eddie Harris: I haven't got an arm like you, kid. I have to put anything on it I can find. Someday you will too.
----------
Jake Taylor: [to Rexman] Hell of a situation we got here. Two on, two out, your team down a run and you've got the chance to be the hero on national television... if you don't blow it. Saw your wife last night. Great little dancer. That guy she was with? I'm sure he's a close personal friend, but tell me, what was he doing with her panties on his head?
[Rexman pops the ball straight up]
Jake Taylor: Uh-oh, Rexie, I don't think this one's got the distance.

In-com-plete
02-13-2008, 10:13 AM
What can you expect when you're on top? You know? It's like Napoleon. When he was the king, you know, people were just constantly trying to conquer him, you know, in the Roman Empire. So, it's history repeating itself all over again.


I like simple pleasures, like butter in my ass, lollipops in my mouth. That's just me. That's just something that I enjoy.


Don't just ram it in there like that, this is not a hole in the wall pal, it’s Rollergirl.

shank
02-14-2008, 12:49 AM
You should never underestimate the predictability of stupidity.


-It could be worse. A woman could cut off your penis while you're sleeping and toss it out the window of a moving car.

-There's always that.


You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.


Taste my pain bitch!


Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere.

jrelway
02-14-2008, 12:56 PM
"Buncha slack jawed fa**ots around here!"

-jesse ventura PREDATOR

DenverBronkHoes
02-16-2008, 12:14 PM
Okay Lunchbox, let's try this again. We tie you to the roof and you jump off and sail like a Spitfire passing right over the arch nemesis La Fours. You then swing up to the stage and knock out the pin. And when that's gone the stage is trashed and we go smoke a bowl. You got it? Now get your fat ass up there. And dude, don't forget your helmet. Snoogens.

Broncogator
03-29-2008, 03:07 PM
I am the master of the C.L.I.T. Remember this ******* face. Whenever you see C.L.I.T., you'll see this ******* face. I make that shit work. It does whatever the **** I tell it to. No one rules the C.L.I.T like me. Not this little ****

none of you little ****s out there. I AM THE C.L.I.T. COMMANDER! Remember that, commander of all C.L.I.T.s! When it comes down to business, this is what I do. I pinch it like this. OOH you little ****. Then I rub my nose with it.

dogfish
04-02-2008, 04:11 PM
Jeremy Grey: What's wrong with you, why you got tht look on your face?
John Beckwith: Claire's mom just made me grab her hooters.
Jeremy Grey: Well snap out of it! What, a hot older women made you feel her cans? Stop crying like a little girl.
John Beckwith: I wasn't crying like a little girl.
Jeremy Grey: Why don't you try getting jacked off under the table in front of the whole damn family and have some real problems, jackass. Hey, what were they like anyway? They looked pretty good, are they real? Are they built for speed or comfort? What'd you do with them? Motorboat? You play the motorboat?
PBBBTTTT! PBBBTTT! You motorboatin son of a bitch! You old sailor you! Where is she? She still in the house?
John Beckwith: What's wrong with you?
Jeremy Grey: What do you mean "what's wrong with me?" What's wrong with you?
John Beckwith: No, what's wrong with you?
Jeremy Grey: No, what's wrong with you? You're projecting!
John Beckwith: Drop it.
Jeremy Grey: You drop it! You stop projecting on me! Why don't you go enjoy yourself while I go ice my balls and spit up blood.
John Beckwith: Drop it!
Jeremy Grey: Team player!


~wedding crashers

shank
04-02-2008, 04:35 PM
that ^ exchange is my favorite part of the whole movie.

dogfish
04-02-2008, 06:45 PM
that ^ exchange is my favorite part of the whole movie.

me too. . . . :D

NavinJohnson
04-17-2008, 09:04 PM
Just a tip of the movie quote iceberg, in no particular order.

-"Shut up! Will you shut up?" "Ah! Now we see the violence inherent in the system." "Shut up!" "Come see the violence inherent in the system! Help! Help! I'm being repressed!"

-"Do you have any idea how crazy you are?" "You mean the nature of this conversation?" "I mean the nature of you."

-"It's not my fault being the biggest and the strongest. I don't even exercise."

-"I knew Moe, I knew he was headstrong. Talking loud, saying stupid things. So when he turned up dead... I let it go... and I said to myself... this is the business we've chosen."

-"Yee haw! Ride 'em, cowboy! Yippee-kai-yo, kai-yay!" "Get off... the nuclear... warhead!"

-"The time for honoring yourself will soon be at an end."

-"I have the letters right here." "Tell me, when we searched the place, where were they?" "Sam's piano." "Serves me right for not being musical."

-"They had a reputation for breaking up bars. But they knew that instant they made a fatal mistake. This time they walked into the wrong bar."

-"Charlie don't surf!"

-"I tell you, those voices soared... higher and farther than anybody in a gray place dares to dream. It was like some beautiful bird flapped into our drab little cage..."

-"I'm walkin' down the street, minding my own business... just walking along... feelin' good. I walk around the corner, man walks up, hits me in my chest, right? I fall on the ground, right? And I look up... it's Dr. Martin Luther King. I said: Dr. King! He said: Opps! I thought you were somebody else."

-"I'm the hand up Mona Lisa's skirt. I'm a surprise, Kevin."

-"Well, I gotta' tell ya'... I'd be very, very careful who you talk to about that. Because the person who wrote that is dangerous. And this buttoned-down, oxford-cloth psycho might just snap..."

Flatinum
04-18-2008, 08:38 AM
Rollin: [as Jimmy walks in on the town meeting that determines Coach Dale's fate] What can I do for you, Jimmy?
Jimmy Chitwood: I got something to say.
Rollin: All right, say what you've gotta say.
Jimmy Chitwood: [to crowd] I don't know if it'll make a difference, but I figured it's time for me to start playing ball.
George: [as crowd is cheering, points to Dale] I told you, once we got rid of him!
Jimmy Chitwood: But, there's just one thing... I play, Coach stays. He goes, I go.
George: [crowd starts murmuring] Uhhh, the coach is dismissed by a vote of 48 to 25...
Opal Fleener: I think we should vote again!
Rollin: All those in favor of the coach staying, say 'Aye'
[majority of crowd says 'Aye']
Rollin: , all opposed...
[a handful say 'nay', tears up George's tally sheet]
Rollin: ... Coach stays!

Den21vsBal19
04-18-2008, 06:42 PM
A dusky beauty emerges from the water and says

'The Royal Penis is clean, Your Majesty'

Never fails to crack me up :laugh:

ManchesterBroncoLUHG
04-19-2008, 05:48 AM
"It's a pity you didn't sign The Smiths but you were right about Mick Hucknall, his music is shit and he's a Ginger." - God to Tony Wilson (RIP) in the film about the greatest city in the World.

DenverBronkHoes
04-19-2008, 06:02 AM
this scene is brilliant... please dont throw any race cards out... anyone who watches this will respect its worth, especially italians....

[Don Vincenzo is complaining about how lousy Clifford Worley is to lie]

Vincenzo Coccotti: Now, what we have got here is a little game of show and tell, and you don't wanna show me nothing and tell me everything.

Clifford Worley: You're Sicilian, ha?

Vincenzo Coccotti: Yeah, Sicilian.

Clifford Worley: I read a lot. Especially about things... about history. I find that shit fascinating. I don't know whether you know or not. Sicilians were spawned by niggers.

Vincenzo Coccotti: Come again?

Clifford Worley: It's a fact. See, Sicilians have black blood pumpin' through their hearts. If you don't believe me you can look it up. Hundreds and hundreds of years ago the moors conquered Sicily and the moors are niggers.

Vincenzo Coccotti: Yes...

Clifford Worley: Sicilians were like wops from northern Italy. They all had blonde hair and blue eyes but when the moors moved in there, well they changed the whole country. They did so much ******' with Sicilian women that they changed the whole bloodline forever. That's why blonde hair and blue eyes became black hair and dark skin. It's absolutely amazing to me to think that to this day, hundreds of years later, that Sicilians still carry that ****** gene. Now this...

Vincenzo Coccotti: Hahahahahahahaha...

Clifford Worley: No, I'm quoting. It's written, it's a fact, it's written.

Vincenzo Coccotti: Hahahahahahahaha... I love this guy.

Clifford Worley: Your ancestors were niggers and your great-great-great-great grandmother ****** a ****** and she had a half ****** kid. If that's a fact, tell me, am I lying?

TRUE ROMANCE

Crushaholic
05-21-2008, 12:28 PM
Prince Akeem: I am Akeem.
Lisa McDowell: It's nice to meet you, Akeem.
Prince Akeem: I have recently been placed in charge of garbage. Do you have any that needs to be disposed of?
Lisa McDowell: No. It's totally empty.
Prince Akeem: When it fills up, call me. I will take it out most urgently.
Lisa McDowell: That's good to know.
Prince Akeem: When you think of garbage, think of Akeem.

BroncoJoe
05-21-2008, 12:35 PM
Not from a movie, but I was LMAO

Mr. Mackey: Attention students. Apparently, Clyde could not have been the one who crapped in the urinal, because Clyde had a colostomy at age 5. 'Kay? Now, whoever did this unspeakable act is still at large. The boys' bathroom is closed until further notice, 'cause one of you thought it would be a good idea... to pull down your pants... m'kay, over your buttcheeks over the urinal... and squeeze out a chocolate hot dog... m'kay? [all the kids in the hall listen, then start laughing] Oh you think that's funny, huh?! Let me assure you, there is nothing funny... about going up to a nice, clean, unsuspectin' urinal, 'kay, droppin' your pants then... turnin' around... squattin' over that urinal, 'kay, maybe... maybe pullin' your buttcheeks apart with your hands, m'kay, and then layin' out a big fudge dragon for all the world to see. Oh yeah, [the kids there begin to laugh] that's real funny! [turns off the mic and slams it down] I'm gonna catch this sonofabitch if it's the last thing I DO! M'kay?!

When you dook in the urinal, it's bad, m'kay! [Stan squirts some cleaning fluid onto the urinal basin] How would you feel... if somebody came into your home, m'kay, pulled down their pants and laid a big mud monkey right on your mom's face? [Stan laughs] Oh you think that's funny, huh?! Yeah, that's real funny!

dogfish
05-21-2008, 03:43 PM
Brandi: Suitor number 3, is your kiss like a soft breeze, a firm handshake or a jackhammer?
Gil Hicks: Definitely a jackhammer, I'm in there with some pressure and when I'm done, you're not the same as before. You're changed.
Brodie: Where do you come up with this shit? That's the cheesiest response to an honest question I have ever heard. I saw you kiss and it wasn't anything like that.
Bob Summers: [Chuckling] Suitor #2, you'll have to wait until you're addressed before you respond.
Brodie: Richard Dawson, why don't you just go back to your podium until it's time to play The Feud. All right?
[Audience laughs]
Gil Hicks: Who the hell did you see me kiss?
Brodie: Some dude backstage. I don't know who he was but he seemed unimpressed.
Gil Hicks: I didn't kiss any guy backstage. I swear. I'm not gay.
Brodie: Hey, Suitorette, this guys a homophobe. You heard how repulsed he sounded. Is this the kind of guy you want to spend a vacation with? This hate-monger?
Gil Hicks: I don't hate gay people.
Brodie: So you love them?
Gil Hicks: Yes. I mean no.
Brodie: Textbook closet case self-loather. Can't be comfortable with his own sexuality.



- mallrats

I Bleed Orange and Blue
05-21-2008, 06:44 PM
Clubber Lang.............ppppppaaaaiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnn

Den21vsBal19
06-04-2008, 06:53 PM
Now, Elaine, don't panic...........

On the belt line of the automatic pilot, there's a hollow tube

Now that's the manual inflation nozzle

Pull it out, and blow on it


:rofl:

dogfish
06-04-2008, 07:59 PM
"the only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone when you're uncool"


- lester bang, almost famous

Cleveland Rocks
06-05-2008, 02:03 AM
"I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it? It's like when you put your head to the grass and you can hear the growin' and you can hear the insects. Do you like Beethoven?"
- Stansfield (Gary Oldman) Leon:The Professional

Frank: What kind of beer do you like to drink, neighbor?
Jeffrey: Heineken.
Frank: Heineken? **** that ****! Pabst Blue Ribbon!
-Blue Velvet

"The woods are lovely, dark, and deep. And I have promises to keep. Miles to go before I sleep. Did you hear me, Butterfly? Miles to go, before you sleep."
-Stuntman Mike (Kurt Russell) Death Proof

Jasper: Why's she dressed like that?
Abernathy: Well, you see, we're making a Hollywood movie in town, and it's a cheerleading movie and she's one of the cheerleaders.
Jasper: What's a cheerleader movie?
Abernathy: A movie about cheerleaders.
Jasper: Is it a porno movie?
Abernathy: Yes, it is, but don't mention it. She's shy.
- Death Proof

DenverBronkHoes
06-05-2008, 02:06 AM
MOSS: Who are you? What's your name?
BLAKE: You see this watch? You see this watch?
MOSS: Yeah.
BLAKE: That watch costs more than you car. I made $970,000 last year. How much you make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy, I don't give a shit. Good father, **** you! Go home and play with your kids! You wanna work here, close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you **********? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit?

BLAKE: You can't close the leads you're given, you can't close shit, you are shit! Hit the bricks, pal, and beat it, 'cause you are going out!
LEVENE: The leads are weak.
BLAKE: The leads are weak? ******' leads are weak? You're weak. I've been in this business fifteen years.
MOSS: What's your name?
BLAKE: **** YOU! That's my name. You know why, mister? 'Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, and I drove an $80,000 BMW. That's my name!

MOSS: We don't gotta sit here and listen to this.
BLAKE: You sure don't pal, 'cause the good news is - you're fired!

MOSS: That guy's a ******' *******. Anybody who talks to that ******* is a ******' *******.

MOSS: **** the machine, **** the machine, **** THE MACHINE!!

BLAKE: Coffee is for closers!

ROMA: All train compartments smell vaguely of shit. It gets so you don't mind it. That's the worst thing that I can confess. You know how long it took me to get there? A long time. When you die you're going to regret the things you don't do. You think you're queer? I'm going to tell you something: we're all queer. You think you're a thief? So what? You get befuddled by a middle-class morality? Get shut of it. Shut it out. You cheated on your wife? You did it, live with it. You **** little girls, so be it. There's an absolute morality? Maybe. And then what? If you think there is, then be that thing. Bad people go to hell? I don't think so. If you think that, act that way. A hell exists on earth? Yes. I won't live in it. That's me. You ever take a dump made you feel like you'd just slept for twelve hours?


Glen Gary Glenn Ross

Skinny
06-05-2008, 06:06 AM
Translator: The general would like to know if you will drink a toast with him.

Patton: Thank the general and tell him I have no desire to drink with him or any other Russian son of a bish.

Translator: [Nervous] I can't tell him that!

Patton: Tell him, every word.

Translator: [In Russian] He says he will not drink with you or any Russian son of a bish.

Russian general: [In Russian] Tell him he is a son of a bish, too. Now!

Translator: [Very nervous] He says he thinks you are a son of a bish, too.

Patton: [Laughing] All right. All right, tell him I'll drink to that; one son of a bish to another. :cheers:

EastCoastBronco
06-05-2008, 07:10 AM
Great movie full of great one liners Skinny!

"I read your book you son of a bish!"...

MasterShake
06-05-2008, 07:43 AM
From Spaceballs:
http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u14/Kenobi1_bucket/medium_lordhelmet.jpg

"What's the matter Colonel Sanders....CHICKEN??!"
-Lord Helmet

Den21vsBal19
06-05-2008, 03:39 PM
From Spaceballs:
http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u14/Kenobi1_bucket/medium_lordhelmet.jpg

"What's the matter Colonel Sanders....CHICKEN??!"
-Lord Helmet
I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!

MasterShake
06-05-2008, 03:58 PM
I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!

Prepare to be jammed

Den21vsBal19
06-05-2008, 04:43 PM
Prepare to be jammed
We're gonna have go right to... ludicrous speed

dogfish
06-14-2008, 02:48 AM
"Some of us were kept alive... to work... loading bodies. The disposal units ran night and day. We were that close to going out forever. But there was one man who taught us to fight, to storm the wire of the camps, to smash those metal mother******s into junk. He turned it around. He brought us back from the brink. His name is Connor. John Connor. Your son, Sarah, your unborn son."


~ kyle reese, the terminator

EastCoastBronco
06-24-2008, 10:06 AM
Here are a couple of good ones:

1) From Firefly.
Simon: "You had the Alliance on you … criminals and savages. Half the people on the ship have been shot or wounded, including yourself. And you’re harboring known fugitives."
Mal: "We’re still flying."
Simon: "That’s not much."
Mal: "It’s enough."


2) From No Country for Old Men.
Anton Chigurh: "Don't put it in your pocket, sir. Don't put it in your pocket. It's your lucky quarter."
Gas Station Proprietor: "Where do you want me to put it?"
Anton Chigurh: "Anywhere not in your pocket. Where it'll get mixed in with the others and become just a coin. Which it is."

BroncoFanatic
06-24-2008, 10:26 AM
From Firefly:

(Malcolm Reynolds): "Ok, I'm confused...I'm angry...and I'm armed!"

atwater27
06-24-2008, 11:21 AM
Lucifer: I can lay you out and fill your mouth with your mother's feces; or, we can talk.

Gabriel: I'm an angel. I kill firstborns while their mamas watch. I turn cities into salt. I even, when I feel like it, rip the souls from little girls, and from now till kingdom come, the only thing you can count on in your existence is never understanding why.

Thomas Daggett: Did you ever notice how in the Bible, when ever God needed to punish someone, or make an example, or whenever God needed a killing, he sent an angel? Did you ever wonder what a creature like that must be like? A whole existence spent praising your God, but always with one wing dipped in blood. Would you ever really want to see an angel?

Lucifer: Y'see, I'm not here to help you and the little bitch because I love you or because I care for you, but because two hells is one hell too many, and I can't have that.

Lucifer: Little Tommy Daggett. How I loved listening to your sweet prayers. Then you would hop into bed, afraid that I was hiding under it. And I was!

Joseph: And this is for you. He's also a hermaphrodite.
[lifts the sheet covering the corpse so Thomas can see]
Joseph: He's got both male and female sex organs.
Thomas Daggett: Think of the possibilities!
Joseph: Yeah, you can be impotent and frigid all at the same time.

atwater27
06-24-2008, 11:36 AM
The Bride: You any good with that shotgun?
Karen Kim: Not that I have to be at this range, but I'm a ******* surgeon with this shotgun.
The Bride: Well, guess what, bitch? I'm better than Annie Oakley and I've got you right in my sights, so let's talk.

Elle Driver: [reading] "In Africa, the saying goes 'In the bush, an elephant can kill you, a leopard can kill you, and a black mamba can kill you. But only with the mamba is death sure.' Hence its handle, 'Death Incarnate.'" Pretty cool, huh?"

Elle Driver: The venom of a black mamba can kill a human in four hours, if, say, bitten on the ankle or the thumb. However, a bite to the face or torso can bring death from paralysis within 20 minutes. Now, you should listen to this, 'cause this concerns you. The amount of venom that can be delivered from a single bite can be gargantuan. You know, I've always liked that word...”gargantuan"... so rarely have an opportunity to use it in a sentence. If not treated quickly with antivenom, 10 to 15 milligrams can be fatal to human beings. However, the black mamba can deliver as much as 100 to 400 milligrams of venom from a single bite.

Bill: [the Bride lunges for Bill's sword, Bill draws a gun and shoots, barely missing her] Now if you don't settle down, I'm gonna have to put one in your kneecap. And I hear tell that's a very painful place to get shot in.
[he suddenly fires again, hitting a fruit bowl and splattering the Bride, making her jump]
Bill: Ha ha ha! I'm just ******* with you.

The Bride: Karen... I just found out... right now... not a moment before you blew a hole through the door... that I'm pregnant.
Karen Kim: What is this?
The Bride: On the floor... by the door... is a strip that says I'm pregnant.
Karen Kim: Bull shit.
The Bride: Any other time you'd be a hundred per cent right... This time you're a hundred per cent wrong... I'm the deadliest woman in the world. But right now Im just scared shitless for my baby. Please. Just look at the strip. Please?
Karen Kim: Stay where you are and don't move.

underrated29
06-24-2008, 12:07 PM
National treasure 2:

Nicholas cage is shouting and riding the railing in the queens parliment. The little british bobby has had enough and says to him "dismount the bannister."

I love it! The british are so freaking proper, even when they are all pissed off.

Dismount the bannister, instead of get the F*** off! Fabulous.

dogfish
06-24-2008, 01:53 PM
"The weekend has landed. All that exists now is clubs, drugs, pubs and parties. I've got 48 hours off from the world, man. I'm gonna blow steam out my head like a screaming kettle, I'm gonna talk cod shit to strangers all night, I'm gonna lose the plot on the dancefloor. The free radicals inside me are freakin', man! Tonight I'm Jip Travolta, I'm Peter Popper, I'm going to never-never land with my chosen family, man. We're gonna get more spaced out than Neil Armstrong ever did, anything could happen tonight, you know? This could be the best night of my life. I've got 73 quid in my back burner - I'm gonna wax the lot, man! The Milky Bars are on me! Yeah!"

- jip, human traffic

Thnikkaman
06-24-2008, 02:04 PM
"The weekend has landed. All that exists now is clubs, drugs, pubs and parties. I've got 48 hours off from the world, man. I'm gonna blow steam out my head like a screaming kettle, I'm gonna talk cod shit to strangers all night, I'm gonna lose the plot on the dancefloor. The free radicals inside me are freakin', man! Tonight I'm Jip Travolta, I'm Peter Popper, I'm going to never-never land with my chosen family, man. We're gonna get more spaced out than Neil Armstrong ever did, anything could happen tonight, you know? This could be the best night of my life. I've got 73 quid in my back burner - I'm gonna wax the lot, man! The Milky Bars are on me! Yeah!"

- jip, human traffic

I need to see this one too.

dogfish
06-24-2008, 02:12 PM
I need to see this one too.


yes, yes you do. . . it's a drug-addled weekend in the lives of five british club kids-- hilarious!

Bizzarro
06-25-2008, 05:56 PM
"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled, was making the word think he didn't exist" The usual suspects. :cool:

dogfish
09-10-2008, 12:04 AM
Mongol General: Conan! What is best in life?
Conan: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.
Mongol General: That is good! That is good.


~conan the barbarian

DenverBronkHoes
09-10-2008, 12:25 AM
THE BURBS

Art Wiengartner: [finds a femur bone] Ray, there's no doubt anymore. This is real. Our neighbors are murdering people. They're chopping them up. They're burying them in their backyard. Ray... This is Walter.
[They both scream]

Art: Rumsfield and I, we flushed them out. We wrote a note, we slipped it under the door, we rang the bell and then we ran.
Ray Peterson: You did that?
Art: Yeah.
Ray Peterson: [Jumps up] OH GEEZ! STUPID IDI - I can't believe you - -
[Crushes a beer can]
Art: All I did was write, "I know what you've done". That's all. I didn't sign it.
Ray Peterson: OH! I can't belie - YOU STUPID... GOD!
Art: You gotta goose these people every once in a while. You gotta give them a little shot, give them a little whack, let them know that you're there.

Ray Peterson: [chanting] I'm not going to listen to this, I'm not going to here this now.
Art: Ray! Ray! Your chanting!
[points to book]
Art: Ray, unconscious chanting... your chanting!
Ray Peterson: [continues Chanting with fingers in ears]
Art: [chants] I want to kill everyone. Satan is good. Satan is our pal.
Art: Hey, once they get in here,
[points to Ray's head]
Art: its over pal.

over-rated all time classics

MileHighWrath
09-10-2008, 01:13 PM
You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me.
Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with nail polish. These f**king amateurs...

drewloc
10-03-2008, 09:25 AM
Dr. Peter Venkman: We've been going about this all wrong. This Mr. Stay Puft is okay. He's a sailor, he's in New York. We get this guy laid, we won't have any trouble.

Dr. Peter Venkman: Egon, this reminds me of the time you tried to drill a hole through your head. Remember that?
Dr. Egon Spengler: That would have worked if you hadn't stopped me.

Flatinum
10-03-2008, 09:44 AM
Cool Hand Luke

Captain - "What we've got here is... failure to communicate. Some men you just can't reach. So you get what we had here last week, which is the way he wants it... well, he gets it. I don't like it any more than you men".

Den21vsBal19
10-03-2008, 09:45 AM
GOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING VIET-NAM!!!!!!

Hey, this is not a test, this is rock & roll, it's time to rock it from the Delta to the DMZ!!
Is that me, or does it sound like an Elvis Pressley movie?
Viva Da-Nang, Oh Viva Da-Nang!
Da-Nang me, Da-Nang me, why don't they get a rope & hang meeeeeee!!!!!
Hey is it too early to be that loud?
Too late, It's 0600 hours. What does the "O" stand for? O my God, it's early!

Broncolingus
10-03-2008, 09:46 AM
"Do you have a pool?"

"A pool...and a pond. A pond would be good for you."

girler
10-03-2008, 09:49 AM
GOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING VIET-NAM!!!!!!

Hey, this is not a test, this is rock & roll, it's time to rock it from the Delta to the DMZ!!
Is that me, or does it sound like an Elvis Pressley movie?
Viva Da-Nang, Oh Viva Da-Nang!
Da-Nang me, Da-Nang me, why don't they get a rope & hang meeeeeee!!!!!
Hey is it too early to be that loud?
Too late, It's 0600 hours. What does the "O" stand for? O my God, it's early!

It's hot! Damn hot! Got a window? Open it!

Thnikkaman
10-03-2008, 09:52 AM
Slap Shot:

Reggie Dunlop: Oh you cheap son of a bitch. Are you crazy? Those guys are retards!
McGrath: I got a good deal on those boys. The scouts said they showed a lot of promise.
Reggie Dunlop: They brought their ******' TOYS with 'em!
McGrath: Well, I'd rather have em playin with their toys than playin with themselves
Reggie Dunlop: They're too dumb to play with themselves. Boy, every piece of garbage that comes into the market and you gotta buy it!
McGrath: Reg, Reg, that reminds me. I was coachin' in Omaha in 1948 and Eddie Shore sends me this guy who was a terrible masturbator, you know, couldn't control himself. Why, he would get deliberate penalties so he could get over in the penalty box all by himself and damned if he wouldn't... you know...

Lily Braden: You're bullshit, you're really bullshit.
Ned Braden: You're drunk.
Reggie Dunlop: You're right, he's bullshit.
Lily Braden: Yeah? Well, he and I are the only decent items in this town
[Leaves]
Reggie Dunlop: That's great. Why should she care what anyone thinks about her? Shes just scrappin' Hey, how does Braden treat her? Is he nice to her?
Denis Lemieux: Oh yeah, he love her. He tell me 'I love her.'
Reggie Dunlop: Well, maybe Braden's a faggot, you ever think of that?
Denis Lemieux: No way, he got a big ****, like horse.

Tim McCracken: Dunlop, you suck ****.
Reggie Dunlop: All I can get.

Reggie Dunlop: Goddamn lard-ass Barkley Donaldson, I'm tellin' you he jumped us!
Steve Hanson: [nodding head] Mm huh.
Reggie Dunlop: Gloves off, stick down, no warning, he challenged the Chiefs!
Steve Hanson: Called us names!
Reggie Dunlop: Called us names! But Dave was there.
Steve Hanson: Dave's a killer!
Johnny Upton: Dave's a mess.
Reggie Dunlop: But Dave's out. Who's gonna take his place?
Ned Braden: Is the answer Jesus?
Reggie Dunlop: [looks at the Hanson brothers] Ok guys. Show us what you got.

[referee skates over to Steve Carlson during the playing of the National Anthem]
Peterboro Referee: I got my eye on the three of you. You pull one thing, you're out of this game. I run a clean game here. I have any trouble here, I'll suspend ya.
Steve Hanson: I'm listening to the ******* song!

Jim Carr: Hi, Jim Carr again. Denis, I know that some in our audience don't know the finer points of hockey. Could you tell them, for example, what is icing?
Denis Lemieux: Well, um, icing happen when the puck come down, bang you know, before the other guys you know. Nobody there, you know. My arm go comes up then the game stop then start up.
Jim Carr: I see. What is high-sticking?
Denis Lemieux: High-sticking happen when the guy take the stick, you know, and he go like that
[high-sticks Jim Carr]
Denis Lemieux: you know. You don't do that.
Jim Carr: You don't do that?
Denis Lemieux: Oh no, never, never.
Jim Carr: Why not?
Denis Lemieux: Against the rules. You know, you're stupid when you do that. Just some English pig with no brains, you know.
Jim Carr: Uh, what is slashing?
Denis Lemieux: Slashing is um, like that
[demonstrates on Jim Carr]
Denis Lemieux: you know.
Jim Carr: Mm-hmm. And there's a penalty for that?
Denis Lemieux: Yeah and for the trip also, you know like that
[demonstrates]
Denis Lemieux: . And for hook like this
[demonstrates]
Denis Lemieux: . And for spear, you know, like that.
[demonstrates]
Denis Lemieux: You do that, you go to the box, you know. Two minutes, by yourself, you know and you feel shame, you know. And then you get free.

drewloc
10-03-2008, 11:40 AM
Cadet Carey Mahoney: What are you doing at the academy?
Cadet Moses Hightower: I got bored with my chosen profession.
Cadet Carey Mahoney: What was that?
Cadet Moses Hightower: I was a florist.
Cadet Carey Mahoney: A florist?
Cadet Moses Hightower: You know, flowers and sh**.

drewloc
10-03-2008, 11:42 AM
Sgt. Roger Murtaugh: God hates me. That's what it is.
Sgt. Martin Riggs: Hate him back. It works for me.
-----
Sgt. Roger Murtaugh: What do you do? Sleep with that thing under your pillow?
Sgt. Martin Riggs: I would if I slept.
-----
Sgt. Roger Murtaugh: You ever met anybody you didn't kill?
Sgt. Martin Riggs: Well, I haven't killed you yet.

Broncolingus
10-03-2008, 11:42 AM
Pretty much any part of Team America...

Den21vsBal19
10-03-2008, 04:41 PM
It's hot! Damn hot! Got a window? Open it!
And tonight it's going to be hot & wet.................................that's OK if you're with a lady, but it ain't no good if you're in the jungle

NameUsedBefore
10-03-2008, 05:51 PM
Blade Runner,

"It's too bad she wont live! But then again, who does?"

MileHighWrath
10-03-2008, 06:10 PM
Those are good burgers Walter.

Shut the f*** up Donny!

sneakers
10-04-2008, 12:09 AM
"Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell....would you like a cookie son?"

Chica_Ang
10-04-2008, 03:21 AM
It's a Liger.

What's a Liger?

It's pretty much my favorite animal...preferred skills in magic.

:D

schnooks1
10-04-2008, 06:27 AM
King: Now, shall Mr. Lincoln be winning this war he is fighting at present?
Anna: No one knows really.
King: Well, does he have enough guns and elephants for transporting things?
Anna: I don't think they have elephants in America, your majesty.
King: No elephants? No wonder he is not winning war!



---------------------------------------------------------------------------
King: ...Pairs of male elephants to be released into the forests of America. There it is hoped that they will grow in number and the people can tame them and use them as beasts of burden.
Anna: But your majesty, I don't think you mean pairs of MALE elephants.





King: I do not remember such words.
Anna: I remember them.
King: I will do remembering!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anna: Oh, but this is a lie!
King: [in agreement] It is a FALSE lie!




One of the all time classic movies! I am still in love with Yul Brynner!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgp1fncdi4E

Den21vsBal19
10-04-2008, 06:44 AM
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!!!!

Charlie Croker (Michael Caine), The Italian Job

Kapaibro
10-04-2008, 07:55 AM
Kyra: How do I get eyes like that?
Richard B. Riddick: You gotta kill a few people.

--------------------------

Kyra: Shit! I hate not being the bad guys!

--------------------------

Richard B. Riddick: It's an animal thing. (whilst petting a man-eating Lava hound)

Kapaibro
10-04-2008, 08:06 AM
Paris: Paris P. Olgilvie. Antiquities dealer, entrepreneur.
Riddick: Richard B. Riddick. Escaped convict. Murderer.

------------------------------------------

Jack: Where the hell can I get eyes like that?
Riddick: Gotta kill a few people.
Jack: 'Kay, I can do it.
Riddick: Then you got to get sent to a slam, where they tell you you'll never see daylight again. You dig up a doctor, and you pay him 20 menthol Kools to do a surgical shine job on your eyeballs.
Jack: So you can see who's sneaking up on you in the dark?
Riddick: Exactly.

-----------------------------

Johns: Battlefield doctors decide who lives and dies. It's called 'triage'.
Riddick: They kept calling it 'murder' when I did it.

-------------------------------

Johns: He just escaped from a maximum security prison.
Fry: Should he just stay locked up forever?
Johns: That would be my choice.
Fry: Is he really that dangerous?
Johns: Only around humans.

--------------------------------

Johns: How's it look?
Riddick: Looks clear.
[Johns steps forward, and a creature flies out towards them. They duck and it flies into the night]
Johns: You said it was clear!
Riddick: I said it *looked* clear.
Johns: Well, how does it look now?
Riddick: Looks clear.

MileHighWrath
10-04-2008, 10:43 AM
I don't need you to tell me how f***ing good my coffee is, okay? I'm the one who buys it. I know how good it is. When Bonnie goes shopping she buys SHIT. I buy the gourmet expensive stuff because when I drink it I want to taste it. But you know what's on my mind right now? It AIN'T the coffee in my kitchen, ....

Kapaibro
10-04-2008, 11:24 AM
I don't need you to tell me how f***ing good my coffee is, okay? I'm the one who buys it. I know how good it is. When Bonnie goes shopping she buys SHIT. I buy the gourmet expensive stuff because when I drink it I want to taste it. But you know what's on my mind right now? It AIN'T the coffee in my kitchen, ....

Closely followed by the most disgusting scene in the whole film, topless John Travolta!

Broncolingus
10-04-2008, 12:24 PM
I don't need you to tell me how f***ing good my coffee is, okay? I'm the one who buys it. I know how good it is. When Bonnie goes shopping she buys SHIT. I buy the gourmet expensive stuff because when I drink it I want to taste it. But you know what's on my mind right now? It AIN'T the coffee in my kitchen, ....

"Did you see a sign in my in my driveway that said..."

Chica_Ang
10-05-2008, 01:11 AM
"...just because you're jealous that I've been chatting online with babes, all day...":lol:

MileHighWrath
10-05-2008, 01:18 AM
The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that, poof. He's gone.

Chica_Ang
10-05-2008, 06:03 PM
"This ain't over. This is bigtime, baby."

drewloc
10-07-2008, 07:51 AM
Spaceballs

Dark Helmet: What the Hell am I looking at?! When does this happen in the movie?!
Col. Sandurz: Now! You're looking at "now," sir. Everything that happens now is happening "now."
Dark Helmet: What happened to "then?"
Col. Sandurz: We passed it.
Dark Helmet: When?
Col. Sandurz: Just now. We're at now "now."
Dark Helmet: Go back to "then."
Col. Sandurz: When?
Dark Helmet: Now.
Col. Sandurz: Now?!
Dark Helmet: Now!
Col. Sandurz: I can't.
Dark Helmet: Why?
Col. Sandurz: We missed it.
Dark Helmet: When?
Col. Sandurz: Just now.
Dark Helmet: When will "then" be "now?"
Col. Sandurz: Soon.
Dark Helmet: How soon?
Spaceball: Sir!
Dark Helmet: What?
Spaceball: We've identified their location.
Dark Helmet: Where?
Spaceball: It's the moon of Vega.
Col. Sandurz: Good work. Set a course and prepare for our arrival.
Dark Helmet: When?
Spaceball: Nineteen-hundred hours.
Col. Sandurz: Buy high noon tomorrow they will be our prisoners.
Dark Helmet: Who?!

Flatinum
10-07-2008, 09:33 AM
Fast Times at Ridgemont High

{after Spicoli wrecks Jefferson's car]
Jefferson's Brother: My brother's gonna kill us! He's gonna kill us! He's gonna kill you and he's gonna kill me, he's gonna kill us!
Jeff Spicoli: Hey man, just be glad I had fast reflexes!
Jefferson's Brother: My brother's gonna shit!
Jeff Spicoli: Make up your mind, dude, is he gonna shit or is he gonna kill us?
Jefferson's Brother: First he's gonna shit, then he's gonna kill us!
Jeff Spicoli: Relax, all right? My old man is a television repairman, he's got this ultimate set of tools. I can fix it.

Broncolingus
10-07-2008, 10:04 AM
"I'm your huckleberry..."

Thnikkaman
10-07-2008, 10:19 AM
How am I driving? 1-800-I'm-gonna-******'-die!

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 10:26 AM
"careful u idiot i said across her nose not up it"

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 10:28 AM
Well what do u you know about triganometry?
I can care less about triganometry
Well did u know without triganometry there would be no engineering?
And without lamps there'd be no LIGHHT

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 10:33 AM
nobody knocks off an old man in my neihborhood and gets away with it

Broncolingus
10-07-2008, 10:34 AM
Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe?

http://johnlarroquetteproject.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/principal-vernon.jpg

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 10:36 AM
"Uh Carl..."
"yea"
"Can i ask u a question?"
"Sure..."
"How does one become a janitor?"
"You wanna become a janitor?"
"No i just want to know how one becomes a janitor cuz Andrew here is very interested in persuing a career in the custodial arts"

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 10:38 AM
Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe?

http://johnlarroquetteproject.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/principal-vernon.jpg

ill give u the answer to that question next saturday..... dont mess with a bull, you'll get the horns

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 10:40 AM
"if i wasnt jamaican, why would wear this hat?"

Broncolingus
10-07-2008, 10:51 AM
ill give u the answer to that question next saturday..... dont mess with a bull, you'll get the horns

"Your mine, Bender...for two months, I gotcha...I gotcha."

http://www.joblo.com/newsimages1/prinvern.jpg

"What can I say? I'm thrilled!"

Den21vsBal19
10-07-2008, 02:21 PM
You Klingon *******, you've killed my son!!!!!!

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 05:21 PM
"Your mine, Bender...for two months, I gotcha...I gotcha."

http://www.joblo.com/newsimages1/prinvern.jpg

"What can I say? I'm thrilled!"

"Brilliant idea sir....but what if theres a fire? im sure breaking fire codes and endangering the lives of children would not be smart in this junction of your career"

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 05:24 PM
"your not fooling anybody bender.... the next screw that falls out is going to be you."

"(whisper: eat my shorts)"

"what was that?"

tbc'd

Den21vsBal19
10-07-2008, 05:58 PM
Hedley Lamarr: My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Taggart: God darnit, Mr. Lamarr, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Governor William J. Le Petomane: We've gotta protect our phoney baloney jobs, gentlemen!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Harriet Johnson: I'm not used to public speaking... WE THE WHITE, GODFEARING CITIZENS OF ROCK RIDGE wish to express our extreme displeasure with your choice of sheriff. Please remove him immediately. The fact that you have sent him here just goes to prove that you are the leading ******* in the state!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hedley Lamarr: My mind is aglow with whirling, transient nodes of thought careening through a cosmic vapor of invention.
Taggart: Ditto.
Hedley Lamarr: "Ditto?" "Ditto," you provincial putz?

itsdasteve
10-07-2008, 08:14 PM
Pregnant chick: Go **** your ******* bong!

Seth Rogan: I will! Doggiestyle for once.

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 08:15 PM
Harold: I always thought masturbation was the ultimate act of self-absorption.
Sam Weber: Do you jerk off?
Harold: Does a bear have fleas?
Sam Weber: No, no, "Does a bear shit in the woods?"
Harold: Does a bear jerk off?
Nick: You know, I shit in the woods, but I can't jerk off.

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 08:18 PM
"grab some wood there bubb"

NameUsedBefore
10-07-2008, 08:22 PM
Doctor "Lexus" from the hilarious Idiocracy:


Right, kick ass. Well, don't want to sound like a dick or nothin', but, ah... it says on your chart that you're f***ed up. Ah, you talk like a fag, and your shit's all retarded. What I'd do, is just like... like... you know, like, you know what I mean, like...


Clip. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3Yiiphkrqw)

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 08:26 PM
"you're a ******* idiot"
"im a ******* idiot cuz i cant make a lamp?"
"no your genius cuz u cant make a lamp"

DenverBronkHoes
10-07-2008, 08:26 PM
My impression of life at Big Bri's house, "Son?" "Yeah, Dad?" "How was your day, son?" "Great, Dad. How's yours?" "Super. Say, how would like to go fishing this weekend?" "Great, Dad. But I got homework to do." "That's okay, son. You can do it on the boat." "Gee." "Hon, isn't our son swell?" "Yes, dear. Isn't life swell?"
[kiss]

Timmy!
10-07-2008, 11:36 PM
Shelby: Say it, Michael.
Michael: Say it?
Shelby: I won't do it unless you say it.
Michael: I'm sorry. I'm having a little bit of trouble concentrating here. What is it exactly you want me to say?
Shelby: You know. Those three...little...words..
Michael: Those three little words... Hold on a minute.
Shelby: What? What's wrong?
Michael: I'm sorry. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Shelby: Why are you acting like this?
Michael: Shelby, I like you. I like you a lot. But things are just moving a little too fast. I'm just not ready to say, "I love you".
Shelby: What makes you think I want you to say, "I love you"?
Michael: Oh, come on. Back there. You wouldn't do it because I wouldn't say those three little words.
Shelby: You colossal moron! "Suck... my... cok".
Michael: Oh, suck my ck! Suck my cok! Suck my cok! Suck my cok!

AlWilsonizKING
10-07-2008, 11:47 PM
"I'm the Dude!!"

"Over the line!!!"

"Shut up Donny"

"Oh, **** it!!"

"The Dude abides!!"

"Not on the rug, man"




"WOLVERINES!!!!!"

"Because we live here!!"

"WOLVERINES!!!!!"

"Let it turn....let it turn to something else!"

"WOLVERINES!!!!!"



"Now what he said was..Chopper sick 'em, but what I heard was..Chopper sick balls!!"

"That's Chopper?"

"Yeah I've noticed lately that the A and the E are starting to go around the sides"

"Ya'll wanna se a dead body?


"I'm gonna get you high today!"

"It's Friday, you aint got no job, you aint got 'ish to do!"

"Mr. Parker aint hittin' that right"

"Round here, between Normandy and Weston, they call this here a little twenty-twin-twin, Niggaaaaaaaaa"



Just a few that popped itno my head.



PEACE!!!

slim
10-07-2008, 11:49 PM
We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an *******. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get ****** by dicks. But dicks also **** ********: ******** that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with ******** their way. But the only thing that can **** an ******* is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they **** too much or **** when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a ***** to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become ******** themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us **** this *******, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!

dogfish
10-07-2008, 11:53 PM
Shelby: Say it, Michael.
Michael: Say it?
Shelby: I won't do it unless you say it.
Michael: I'm sorry. I'm having a little bit of trouble concentrating here. What is it exactly you want me to say?
Shelby: You know. Those three...little...words..
Michael: Those three little words... Hold on a minute.
Shelby: What? What's wrong?
Michael: I'm sorry. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Shelby: Why are you acting like this?
Michael: Shelby, I like you. I like you a lot. But things are just moving a little too fast. I'm just not ready to say, "I love you".
Shelby: What makes you think I want you to say, "I love you"?
Michael: Oh, come on. Back there. You wouldn't do it because I wouldn't say those three little words.
Shelby: You colossal moron! "Suck... my... cok".
Michael: Oh, suck my ck! Suck my cok! Suck my cok! Suck my cok!



what's that from?

Timmy!
10-08-2008, 12:21 AM
what's that from?

Tomcats.

You've never seen it? It's not the greatest, but I laughed my ass off :D

Timmy!
10-08-2008, 12:22 AM
We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an *******. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get ****** by dicks. But dicks also **** ********: ******** that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with ******** their way. But the only thing that can **** an ******* is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they **** too much or **** when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a ***** to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become ******** themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us **** this *******, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!

One of the greatest movie quotes of all times. If only people in charge would listen :tsk:

The part where the drunk guy first tells it to Gary in the bar is better though, just saying.

Den21vsBal19
10-08-2008, 12:52 AM
What has to be the most famous single line of all time.................

The name's Bond.................James Bond

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: [Showing Bond a tracking device] Reception on the dashboard, here. Audo-visual
[sic]
Q: , range a hundred and fifty miles.
James Bond: Ingenious, and useful too. Allow a man to stop off for a quick one en route.
Q: It has not been perfected, out of years of patient research, ENTIRELY for that purpose, 007. And incidentally, we'd appreciate its return, along with all your other equipment, INTACT for once, when you return from the field.
James Bond: Well, you'd be surprised the amount of wear and tear that goes on out there in the field.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Now this one I'm particularly keen about. You see the gear lever here? Now, if you take the top off, you will find a little red button. Whatever you do, don't touch it.
James Bond: Yeah, why not?
Q: Because you'll release this section of the roof, and engage and then fire the passenger ejector seat. Whish!
James Bond: Ejector seat? You're joking!
Q: I never joke about my work, 007.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

***** Galore: My name is ***** Galore.
James Bond: I must be dreaming.

edit ~ There's times I hate the language Filter :mad:

Thnikkaman
10-08-2008, 07:53 AM
Doctor "Lexus" from the hilarious Idiocracy:




Clip. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3Yiiphkrqw)

After seeing that, I must go rent it.

shank
10-08-2008, 08:47 AM
After seeing that, I must go rent it.

it's a great movie, but far too prophetic IMO

drewloc
10-08-2008, 10:20 AM
Evolution

Dr. Allison Reed: What are you gonna do?
Dr. Paulson: We might have to amputate.
Harry Block: Whoa, Doc! Don't take the leg! Ira, don't let them take my leg.
Ira Kane: Isn't there anything else you can do? He thinks he's an athlete.
Nurse Tate: Doctor, look!
Dr. Paulson: It's headed for his testicles.
Harry Block: Take it! Take it! Take the leg!

Nurse Tate: I'll get the lubricant...
Dr. Paulson: No time for lubricant!
Harry Block: There's ALWAYS time for lubricant!

AlWilsonizKING
10-08-2008, 12:48 PM
"And none of them want to pay taxes again.....EVER!"

Armageddon


PEACE!!!

MileHighWrath
10-08-2008, 06:58 PM
Oh, I'm sorry. I can't come to the door right now. I'm afraid that in my weakened condition, I could take a nasty spill down the stairs and subject myself to further school absences. You can reach my parents at their places of business. Thank you for stopping by. I appreciate your concern for my well-being. Have a nice day!

Chica_Ang
10-09-2008, 11:43 PM
Curiosity killed the cat, you know.

I know.

DenverBronkHoes
10-10-2008, 06:56 AM
so, in the end... it was Me and Bob, Bob and me... 1st 2 punks, last 2 punks.

Den21vsBal19
10-10-2008, 07:02 AM
From the dawn of time we came; moving silently down through the centuries, living many secret lives, struggling to reach the time of the Gathering; when the few who remain will battle to the last. No one has ever known we were among you... until now.

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I am Connor MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod. I was born in 1518 in the village of Glenfinnan on the shores of Loch Shiel. And I am immortal.

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I have something to say! It's better to burn out than to fade away!

DallasChief
10-10-2008, 07:09 AM
Frank: I told my wife I wouldn't drink tonight. Besides, I got a big day tomorrow. You guys have a great time.
College Student: A big day? Doing what?
Frank: Well, um, actually a pretty nice little Saturday, we're going to go to Home Depot. Yeah, buy some wallpaper, maybe get some flooring, stuff like that. Maybe Bed, Bath, & Beyond, I don't know, I don't know if we'll have enough time.

AlWilsonizKING
10-10-2008, 09:21 AM
"I'm not even supposed to be here today!!!!"

"My girlfriend sucked 36 dicks!"



PEACE!!!

girler
10-10-2008, 10:09 AM
I AM Ironman. :D

Thnikkaman
10-10-2008, 10:26 AM
Jock #1: [at a party] What's up, babes?
Womynist #1: Pack up your rape culture and take a hike!
Jock #1: [holds up a beer] You want a brewdog?
Womynist #1: We're not interested in your penis!
Womynist #2: Wait, wait, I think he's offering us a beer.
[turns to jock, speaks slowly]
Womynist #2: Um... Yes. We, would like, a beer.
Jock #1: Okay!
[turns around to get a beer]
Womynist #1: So it's like, if you're nice to them, they *bring* you things?
Womynist #2: Exactly.

dogfish
10-10-2008, 11:58 AM
Frank: I told my wife I wouldn't drink tonight. Besides, I got a big day tomorrow. You guys have a great time.
College Student: A big day? Doing what?
Frank: Well, um, actually a pretty nice little Saturday, we're going to go to Home Depot. Yeah, buy some wallpaper, maybe get some flooring, stuff like that. Maybe Bed, Bath, & Beyond, I don't know, I don't know if we'll have enough time.


http://img134.imageshack.us/img134/613/funnel3eomy9.gif (http://imageshack.us)


"Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!"

GEM
10-10-2008, 04:02 PM
Hey, hey, If you would take a second, take the little sticks out of your head, clean out your ears, and maybe you would see that I'm a person who has feelings, and all I have to do is do what I wanna do and all I want to do is hold on to my bag and not listen to you! And the only way that I would ever let go of my bag would be if you came over here right now and tried to pry it from my dead, lifeless fingers, okay? If you can get it from my kung-fu grip then you can come and have it, okay? Otherwise, step off, bitch.

Buff
10-10-2008, 04:13 PM
I don't own A gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate AN ENTIRE RACK... What am I gonna do... with a gun rack?

GEM
10-10-2008, 04:18 PM
This movie was filled with good quotes.

Greed is for amateurs. Disorder, chaos, anarchy: now that's fun!

Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children. Do you understand?

Suddenly I heard a tapping, as of someone gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.

Den21vsBal19
10-10-2008, 04:33 PM
Get ready, little lady. Hell is coming to breakfast.

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Are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle Dixie?

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I didn't surrender, but they took my horse and made him surrender.

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There's another old saying, Senator: Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining.

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Dyin' ain't much of a livin', boy.


The Outlaw Josey Wales

Broncolingus
10-11-2008, 12:49 AM
"I was just a boy when the infidels came to my village in their Blackhawk helicopters. The infidels fired at the oil fields and they lit up like the eyes of Allah. Burning oil rained down from the sky and cooked everything it touched. I could only hide myself and cry as my goats were consumed by the fiery black liquid death. In the midst of the chaos, I could swear that I heard my goats screaming for help. As quickly as they had come, the infidels were gone. It was on that day I put a jihad on them. And if you don't believe it, then you'd better kill me now, because I'll put a jihad on you, too."

http://www.dvdactive.com/images/reviews/screenshot/2005/10/teamamericar22.jpg

MileHighWrath
10-11-2008, 07:10 PM
Hey, you created me. I didn't create some loser alter-ego to make myself feel better. Take some responsibility!

drewloc
10-15-2008, 09:09 AM
Aliens

Pvt. W. Hudson: That's it, man. Game over, man! Game over!

drewloc
10-15-2008, 09:11 AM
The Blues Brothers

Jake Blues: I ran out of gas. I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake! A terrible flood! Locusts! It wasn't my fault, I swear to god!
-----
Elwood Blues: It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.

MileHighWrath
10-15-2008, 09:31 AM
They say the f***in smog is the f***in reason why the f***in sunsets are so f***in beautiful

Nick
10-17-2008, 04:25 PM
Mine are from one movie, Glengarry Glen Ross.

Blake: These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you would be throwing them away. They're for closers.

Blake: We're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anybody want to see second prize?
[Holds up prize]
Blake: Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired. :lol:

Blake: A-B-C. A-Always, B-Be, C-Closing. Always be closing, always be closing. :beer:

Blake: That watch costs more than your car. I made $970,000 last year. How much you make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a sh*t. Good father? F**k you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you **********? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don't like it, leave.

Blake: You know why, mister? 'Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove an eighty thousand dollar BMW. *That's* my name.

Blake: You want to know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes BRASS BALLS to sell real estate.

Blake is Alec Baldwin

"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." - Pacino The God Father II

"Leave the gun, take the cannolis." Godfather :laugh:

Den21vsBal19
10-17-2008, 04:41 PM
One of my favourite Friday Night movies, you know action, laughs, no thought required ;) is just about to start, a film with any number of great verbals............Lethal Weapon 2 :D

[Rudd fires at Riggs, hitting him several times. Riggs falls, writhing in pain. Arjen's gun clicks empty. Roger aims at him]
Roger Murtaugh: [shouting] DROP IT, *******!
Martin Riggs: [weakly] Rog...
Arjen Rudd: [holds up his wallet] Diplomatic immunity!
[Roger slowly rolls his head on his neck, takes aim, and fires - his bullet goes through Rudd's wallet, and then his head]
Roger Murtaugh: has just been revoked!

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Martin Riggs: Hey what's with you Rog? She was great, she was beautiful.
Mickey McGee: Yeah, I liked it. She made me want to go out and buy rubbers right now!

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[Ribbing Murtaugh about his daughter's television ad for condoms]
Riggs: You know cops, Roger...............In one ear, out the RUBBER...

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[At the South African Consulate]
Roger Murtaugh: How you doin'?
[his handshake is ignored by the Envoy]
Consulate Envoy: I think there must be some mistake.
Roger Murtaugh: Say what?
Consulate Envoy: Listen to your friend here, he knows what he's talking about. I don't think you want to go to South Africa.
Roger Murtaugh: Why not?
Consulate Envoy: Because you're black!
Leo Getz: [to Murtaugh] You are.
[to Envoy]
Leo Getz: He is.
Roger Murtaugh: Of course I'm black. That's why I want to go to South Africa.
Roger Murtaugh: [louder and more militant] To join my oppressed brothers as they take up the struggle against this racist, fascist, White Minority Regime!
Leo Getz: Racist White Regime!
Roger Murtaugh: One man, one vote!
Leo Getz: One man, one vote!
Roger Murtaugh: [Loudly] Free South Africa you dumb son of a bitch!
Leo Getz: You dumb son of a bitch!
Consulate Envoy: That's quite enough! Get out!
[Security tries to remove Getz and Murtaugh, resuting in a full scale riot inside and outside the Consulate]

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And, of course, you've just got to include Leo's rant about drive-thru's :laugh:

They **** YOU at the drive-thru, okay? They **** YOU at the drive-thru! They know you're gonna be miles away before you find out you got ******! They know you're not gonna turn around and go back, they don't care. So who gets ******? Ol' Leo Getz! Okay, sure! I don't give a ****! I'm not eating this tuna, okay?

DenverBronkHoes
10-17-2008, 04:50 PM
coffee is for closers

DenverBronkHoes
10-17-2008, 04:51 PM
Mine are from one movie, Glengarry Glen Ross.

Blake: These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you would be throwing them away. They're for closers.

Blake: We're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anybody want to see second prize?
[Holds up prize]
Blake: Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired. :lol:

Blake: A-B-C. A-Always, B-Be, C-Closing. Always be closing, always be closing. :beer:

Blake: That watch costs more than your car. I made $970,000 last year. How much you make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a sh*t. Good father? F**k you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you **********? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don't like it, leave.

Blake: You know why, mister? 'Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove an eighty thousand dollar BMW. *That's* my name.

Blake: You want to know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes BRASS BALLS to sell real estate.

Blake is Alec Baldwin

"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." - Pacino The God Father II

"Leave the gun, take the cannolis." Godfather :laugh:

glenngary glenross is a great flick..... That whole scene is classic and will always make top movie scene lists..... Baldwin's best

Nick
10-17-2008, 04:54 PM
Can't forget Goodfella's

Henry Hill: You're a pistol, you're really funny. You're really funny.

Tommy DeVito: What do you mean I'm funny?

Henry Hill: It's funny, you know. It's a good story, it's funny, you're a funny guy.

[laughs]

Tommy DeVito: what do you mean, you mean the way I talk? What?

Henry Hill: It's just, you know. You're just funny, it's... funny, the way you tell the story and everything.

Tommy DeVito: [it becomes quiet] Funny how? What's funny about it?

Anthony Stabile: Tommy no, You got it all wrong.

Tommy DeVito: Oh, oh, Anthony. He's a big boy, he knows what he said. What did ya say? Funny how?

Henry Hill: Jus...

Tommy DeVito: What?

Henry Hill: Just... ya know... you're funny.

Tommy DeVito: You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little ****** up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to ******' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

Henry Hill: Just... you know, how you tell the story, what?

Tommy DeVito: No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How the **** am I funny, what the **** is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!

Henry Hill: [long pause] Get the **** out of here, Tommy!

Tommy DeVito: [everyone laughs] Ya mother******! I almost had him, I almost had him. Ya stuttering ***** ya. Frankie, was he shaking? I wonder about you sometimes, Henry. You may fold under questioning.

Nick
10-17-2008, 04:58 PM
coffee is for closers

PUT THAT COFFEE DOWN!

Coffee is for closers. :laugh:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TROhlThs9qY

Broncolingus
10-18-2008, 12:07 AM
So where's my dad? I thought he was gonna meet me at the airport.

He was at the airport this morning, but you weren't on the plane.

He said he had a surprise for me.

Maybe. I guess you should have called.

I did call, earlier, when...using the phone.

Earlier? When was that?

Er... later...

When, when... then... I...huh.., I left a message.

A message? What number did you call?

3, 6, 4, 5...niner

I can't hear you. You're trailing off. And did i catch a "niner" in there? What Were you calling from a walkie-talkie?

No, it was cordless.

sneakers
12-01-2008, 12:24 AM
Don't tell me my business, devil woman!

KCL
12-01-2008, 12:34 AM
So where's my dad? I thought he was gonna meet me at the airport.

He was at the airport this morning, but you weren't on the plane.

He said he had a surprise for me.

Maybe. I guess you should have called.

I did call, earlier, when...using the phone.

Earlier? When was that?

Er... later...

When, when... then... I...huh.., I left a message.

A message? What number did you call?

3, 6, 4, 5...niner

I can't hear you. You're trailing off. And did i catch a "niner" in there? What Were you calling from a walkie-talkie?

No, it was cordless.

Love that movie.....:lol: