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View Full Version : New Al Davis interview



therick
10-03-2008, 10:09 PM
Raider owner gives views on anything and everything.

(Oakland) In the latest controversy from the Oakland
Raider organization, owner Al Davis is giving his opinions
on topics ranging from the firing of Lane Kiffin, former
players, and even history itself.

Much of the interview focused on the plight of Kiffin,
fired after only 20 games on the job.

"Again, he's not the same guy I hired, and let me clarify
that statement. This Kiffin fellow is some sort of imposter
that managed to fool this organization for the last year.
I hired someone else to coach - Dennis Green. Apparently
a switch occurred somewhere along the line."

When told Kiffin is white and Green is black, negating the
chance of a mixup, Davis reacted.

"Listen, I've been in this business 50 years. The man I hired
was black, as in silver and black. I am the silver, he was to be
the black. Once this Kiffin guy showed up, we figured to
leave well enough alone and try to win. It just didn't work out."

Davis was told of the remarks by recently retired Raider DT
Warren Sapp. Sapp, a co-host on Inside the NFL, claimed
Davis still called plays and interfered in practices.

"His remarks should not be taken seriously," Davis said. "Warren
Sapp was paid a lot of money by me, and only later I found out he
is an extra terrestrial from Saturn. He told me when we signed him
that he already had a ring...he obviously wasn't being clear."

In a recent press conference, Davis accused Patriots coach
Bill Belichick of tampering with WR Randy Moss, and Broncos
coach Mike Shanahan of salary cap violations 10 years ago.
Today, he continued his accusations, directing most of his anger
at a waitress who recently served him at The Olive Garden.

"I refused to pay my check, with cause. She brought garlic to the
table, an obvious attempt to kill me."

When asked if this lays credence to long held rumors Davis is
a vampire, Davis was coy.

"I was there for the birth of the AFL. I was also there for the birth of
Socrates. Do the math."

Davis then abruptly ended the interview, saying the sun was rising. He
did take one parting shot.

"We're going to turn this thing around. The Raiders will be back. Our
commitment to excellence will continue with coach James Lofton."

On his way out, Davis was asked if he meant Tom Cable.

"No, I subscribe to Direct TV."

c.2008, Satire Press International